Support survivors escaping domestic violence

October is Domestic Violence Awareness Month!

1 in 3 women, 1 in 7 men, and up to 1 in 2 transgender and nonbinary college students (there is less data on this group) will experience domestic violence in their lifetimes. And you never know when a survivor in your life may share what they're going through. They could be a friend, a colleague, a neighbor, or a family member.

So, what should you do if someone tells you they're in an abusive relationship?

1. Believe them! The most powerful tool you have is to say, "I'm so sorry you're going through this. I believe you, and I'm here."

2. Support them. Sometimes it's hard to know the best way to help – and that's okay. First, ask what they need. Offer to call a confidential hotline together (like our 24/7 Raphael House hotline at 503-222-6222). Agencies that serve survivors can help figure out a safety plan. The National Domestic Violence Hotline also has an online "create a safety plan" tool, along with info on ways to support survivors.

3. Trust them. Survivors know what's best. Unless they express a desire to leave, don't pressure. Leaving is a process, and it's also the most dangerous time in an abusive relationship. Support their decision, be patient, and keep checking in. Honor their strengths and efforts to keep themselves safe.

If you don't feel safe in your own relationship, please know you're not alone! You deserve to be safe, you deserve to be respected, and help is available.

Donating to Raphael House of Portland helps ensure our life-saving services continue to be available to anyone experiencing abuse, every single day.