"All my life I was made to feel like a thorn in peoples lives, I no longer want to feel like that in my old age."- says a widow mother, 62 years
A single mother, who was a poor widow, raised her. A child bride of 13 married to 35-year-old man, who not only was alcoholic, she was also his second wife. She suffered severe domestic violence at his hands and also the stepdaughter. He became poor after he sold off his land and squandered his wealth in his drunken stupor. After her husband’s death 12 years ago, she made a choice to move out of her village to regain her identity and moved to Vrindavan to live with dignity. Confident that her last journey would be with respect and dignity, she is engaging in creating business opportunities making lentil balls (vadis) with other mothers. She is among many other widow mothers who have to lead a life of neglect and poverty and have faced abuse at the hand of family and children. Most Widows are victims of domestic violence, inflicted by their family members, including their sons and relatives and rendered homeless and destitute to live on the streets of Vrindavan, begging. Widows are subjected to multiple levels of subordination because of their identities of being a woman, a widow and ageing.
Most widows go through feelings of isolation and abandonment and we at Maitri understand the need to address emotional and mental well being of the widows.
June marks two important days, “World Elder Abuse Awareness Day” and “International Widows’ Day” and we at Maître understand how deeply these two days are interlinked with each other. ON #InternationalWidowsDay Maitri released a series of short films capturing the journeys of widow mothers in created by Onir and Anticlock Films. “Widows of Vrindavan” brings together a series of 5 powerful stories of widow mothers and their struggles and survival as family and children left them alone. It encapsulates stories of strong women who were humiliated and abandoned by their family, children and society.
You can watch here :
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=9hUvhHe0J7s&feature=youtu.be
To be abandoned by your family and children is the most devastating experience of life stripping you of your dignity. To be misty eyed and a part of their being always hoping they will remember her and come for her is the most difficult experience. Widow mothers in Vrindavan need compassionate hearts that listen to their stories. MaitriGhar is not just a home but also a space that encourages and salutes fights and voices against abuse. Maitri believes and salutes stories of struggles. Above all, Maitri understands that these journeys are extraordinary and sharing them acknowledges the beauty of courage and plants seeds of hope. Maitri believes sharing heals half of the wounds and opens a path towards change and freedom.
Your contribution ensures that we provide a platform and support the widow mothers in their journey of identity, dignity and respect. Thank you for being instrumental in sharing these stories of struggles and shaping journeys of victories along with the widows of Vrindavan and RadhaKund. We would like to thank you for your support. You help in providing a voice and strengthen a journey that refuses to bow down before abuse and discrimination.
In addition, your contribution also ensures that the widow mothers live in healthy and hygienic environment. They have clean rooms, clean beds, and maintain personal hygiene, which is necessary for a healthy life. With your partnership, we are enabling widows to live with idenitity, dignity and respect. We are providing them with a safe shelter, nutritious meals and health supplements. Additionally widows of MaitriGhar have started a new activity. Widows of MaitriGhar are busy making Vadis (made with soaked and grounded lentils), keeping in mind hygiene and cleanliness .You can encourage them as well as support them by buying and using them in your recipes. Maitri aims to Convert their efforts into a successful venture.
We would like to express our gratitude to all our donors and supporters for supporting the widow mothers and Maitri. It is only with your compassion and support that we are able to reach out and bring joy and laughter in their lives. You make a difference to the lives of the widow mothers in MaitriGhar. Thank you for being our pillar of strength! Gratitude and Blessings.
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Dear Maitri Friend,
Thank you for your continued support to Maitri Ghar, the old age home for widows in Vrindavan. Through your act of kindness, we are able to ensure care and support for the abandoned, ageing and destitute widow mothers with shelter, food, clothing, and healthcare.With Mother’s Day around the corner, we celebrate the widow mothers who have found a better way of living life in Maitri Ghar. We hope that with your support, these widow mothers will continue to rekindle their integrity, dignity and respect.
The seasonal change from harsh winters to warm spring has brought respite to our Maiyyas who are welcoming this change and enjoying the cool spring breeze. Their daily routine continues to be the same more or less but a welcome change is the sewing course in Radha Kund, which has four enthusiastic participants. The Maiyyas go for bhajans every morning and evening. This space gives them a chance to devote their energies to their spiritual and religious development and center the peace within. These spaces are also a place for them to interact and befriend like-minded individuals. This is the time where their yearning for devotional activities is fulfilled. The widows are being provided lunch as well as dinner by our food partners namely, Akshay Patra Foundation at Vrindavan & Radha Kund. There is adequate supply of milk and fruits every day.
Benefits
Total number of meals provided to the widows was 8890 and total number of fruits served to them was 4749 in the month of April. Widows at Vrindavan went for medical checkups on every Friday and on every Saturday at Radha
Kund. In total 7 medical checkups have been conducted at both the places, which includes doctor’s visits to the hospital. Also, 112 widows were taken to the hospital for checkup. Across Maitri Ghar in Vrindavan and Radha Kund,
158kg rice and 120kg sugar was also distributed to 243 widows. In Maitri Ghar at Vrindavan and Radha Kund 326 sarees were distributed to all the widows. Also, 120 oil bottles and 60 towels were distributed to all the widows in Maitri Ghar Vrindavan. Two widows also got their Adhaar card and two of them got their pension.
Success story:
She was born in from North 24 Pargana district in West Bengal. She is 70 years old and had 3 daughters and 2 sons. In a devastating flood 30 years ago in the region, she lost her own mother, as well as a daughter and both her sons. However, she still had two of her daughters. After coming to Maitri Ghar, she was diagnosed with Diabetes for which she began her treatment. After a series of counseling sessions for psychological distress, She regained her faith in her individuality and is currently living a content life with her daughters. We invite Maitri supporters and well-wishers of widow mothers to visit the mothers in Vrindavan and spend time. They crave love and affection and of course, someone to talk to. The mothers have immense motherhood in them and the desire of express this unconditional love is very strong. A listening ear, a shoulder to lean on and a warm hug will last them a long time till the next one.
In addition to all of these, the widows celebrated Holi with all its glory and pride. Maitri celebrates Holi every year with widows of Vrindavan and Radha kund to add colors to their lives, dismissing traditions that forbid them. The celebrations are unique because Maitri widow mothers play Holi with petals and flowers. They decorate the Home, making rangoli (designs made on floor with colors and flowers) and welcome everyone with a special “tilak” on the forehead.
We would like to express our sincere thankyou for every supporter who helped us built a home for her. With your partnership, we are enabling about 250 widow mothers to live with dignity and respect. You have helped us built a home for her.
Your contribution ensures that the widow mothers live in healthy and hygienic environment. They have clean rooms, clean beds, and maintain personal hygiene, which is necessary for a healthy life. Do share the project link with your friends and family and tell them why this project has your heart and what it means to you. Help us spread the word and share our mission with like-minded and passionate people. Thank you for being our pillar of strength! We wish you lots of love and laughter with your loved ones.
Dear Maitri Friend,
Thank you for your continued support to Maitri Ghar, the old age home for widows in Vrindavan. Through your act of kindness, we are able to ensure care and support for the abandoned, ageing and destitute widow motherswith shelter, food, clothing, and healthcare.
Last few months have our widow mothers struggle with the winter. The evenings and mornings are very cold and Maiyyas are enjoying the seasonal change.Their daily routine continues to be the same more or less. They go for bhajans every morning and evening. This space gives them a chance to devote their energies to their spiritual and religious development as well as a space where they interact with like-minded individuals who they can befriend. This is the time where their yearning for devotional activities is fulfilled.The widows are being provided lunch as well as dinner by our food partners namely, Akshay Patra Foundation at Vrindavan & Radha Kund. There is adequate supply of milk and fruits every day.
Total number of meals provided to the widows were 6300 and total number of fruits served to them was 3010 in tha last month. Widows at Vrindavan went for medical checkups on every Friday and on every Saturday at Radha Kund. In total 249 medical checkups have been conducted at both the places, which includes doctor’s visits to the hospital as well as the weekly medical camps. Also, 105 widows were taken to the hospital for checkup. Across Maitri Ghar in Vrindavan and Radha Kund blankets were distributed to 148 widows. Woollen wear like winter caps, gloves and socks were distributed to 240 widows across Maitri Ghar Vrindavan. In Maitri Ghar, Vrindavan and Radha Kund 65 sarees were distributed to all the widows. In Maitri Ghar Vrindavan and Radha Kund, 60 (oil, soap, shampoo) hygiene kits were distributed to all the widows and airbags were given to widows in Maitri Ghar Vrindavan.
Success story :Our beneficiary was born and brought up in Bihar with her 7 sisters and 1 brother. Her father was a farmer. He didn't send any of his children to school but she had studied till 9th grade. She and her younger sister were educated by her uncle. At the age of 14 years, she was married to a 16 years old boy in Balia. Balia is a district in Banaras and is at 40 km distance from her father's home. Rameshwaram had a cement shop. They were happy in their relationship. They were blessed with a daughter. Her daughter is married. Rameshwaram died on 26th March, 1990 due to breaking of a nerve. After his death, she stayed with her in-laws. But later she left the house and went to live with her brother as they didn't treat her well. After some years, her brother died. She left home and reached Vrindavan. There she reached Maitri Ghar on 14th August 2017. She is happy there. She doesn't want to return to her family as she is contended there. She had her heart checkup done and she had severe weakness and joint pain. She was given physiotherapy and medication. She is feeling much better now and is very happy in Maitri Ghar, Vrindavan
We invite Maitri supporters and well-wishers of widow mothers to visit the mothers in Vrindavan and spend time. They crave love and affection and ofcourse talk. The need to touch is very strong in them as they feel unloved, a warm hug lasts them a long time till the next one.
Dear Maitri Friend,
Amidst struggles and survival, Maitri Ghar once again witnessed how the power of celebrations can transcend over life and bring different colours.September was the month of festivities and celebrations. Durgashtami and Dussehra were celebrated beautifully by all the widows in Vrindavan and Radha Kund, the two ashrams supported by Maitri India. Widows are discouraged or banned from celebrating festivals which symbolizes the inauspiciousness they apparently bring to holy and happy occasions. Maitri breaks these stereotypes by making participate and lead the different festivals as a mark of making them feel a part of the joyous festivals and occasions enjoyed by the rest of the society. Navratri is 9 days long holy period of fasting which is proceeded by Dussehra, the 10th day which marks the end of evil. According to mythology, King Ravana was killed by King Rama on the 10th day symbolizing the win of good over evil. The eighth day of Navratri celebrations is called Ashtami and is considered as one of the most significant of all the days of festivities and prayers. Devotees maintain a strict fast and worship goddess Durga on this occasion, to mark the victory of the goddess over demon god Mahishasura. According to Hindu mythology, Kali Mata is said to have emerged from the forehead of Durga to kill Chan da and Munda, the demons of Mahishasura.
The widows celebrated Durgashtami and Dussehra in both ashrams. This year like previous years, Durgashtami and Dussehra were celebrated by the widows with great fervor. They sang hymns and danced together to mark the end of Navratri. Special meals were prepared and they were distributed to the widows along with sweets to celebrate the aforementioned festivals. 66 widows in Maitri Ghar Vrindavan and 62 in Maitri Ghar Radha Kund received 6987 meals and 2924 fruits in September with your support and donations!
The month of October was very exciting. Diwali was celebrated with a lot of festivities by the beneficiary widows. The ashram was decorated with lights and flowers. The widow beneficiaries lit diyas and candles and did pooja to welcome the various Gods and Goddesses on the solemn occasion of Diwali. They all sang bhajans and were served special meals. The police superintendent gifted the widows of Maitri Ghar Vrindavan, shawls and sweets as a gesture of Diwali celebration.
Apart from distribution of money and gifts, October has been an auspicious month with Diwali and Govardhan Puja. Diwali was celebrated with a lot of festivities by the widows. The ashram was decorated with lights and flowers. The widows lit diyas and candles and did pooja to welcome the various Gods and Goddesses on the solemn occasion of Diwali. They all sang bhajans and were served special meals. The police superintendent gifted the widows of Maitri Ghar Vrindavan with shawls and sweets as a gesture of Diwali celebration.
The Maiyyas were visited by the students of Sri Ram School, Delhi on 28th October to make them feel loved and cherished. The visit by these students really made the Maiyyas very happy. They even danced and sang with the students. Each Maiyya was gifted with a saree, soap, shampoo and a biscuit packet. The students even made drawings of Radha & Krishna and gifted them to the Maiyyas
As a mark of celebration, 63 sarees, 214 hygiene kits and Rs.4250 was distributed as gifts to the widows. The widows thanked the staff and were very happy to receive these gifts.Due to bursting firecrackers, there was a lot of smoke leading to asthma attacks to the vulnerable widows. They had regular medical check-ups to tackle various health ailments. 382 medical checkups were done in September to address their various health issues.
We want to thank everyone and extend the colors of these festivities. Your support has helped us light Maitri Ghar. Thankyou
In a country like India, a young widow can get married and have a life of change whereas an old widow is thrown into a life of hell- one of the widows, Vrindavan.
June marks two important days, “World Elder Abuse Awareness Day” and “International Widows’ Day” and we at Maître understand how deeply these two days are interlinked with each other.Many elderly women in India lead lives of neglect and poverty. In particular, elderly widowed women are often denied even basic rights such as food, health-care and are thrown out of their homes by their families. Maitrighar aims to provide a safe home for abandoned widows. We would like to thank you for your support. You help in providing a voice and strengthen a journey that refuses to bow down before abuse and discrimination.
Maitri ghar is not just a home but also a space that encourages and salutes fights and voices against abuse. Maitri believes and salutes stories of struggles. Above all, Maitri understands that these journeys are extraordinary and sharing them acknowledges the beauty of courage and plants seeds of hope. Maitri believes sharing heals half of the wounds and opens a path towards change and freedom.
For instance, one of the widows, living with us since June 2014, speaks about her experiences and journeys with a touch of hope and spirit of survival. “My husband was old and he got frail and sick and eventually died. My first husband sold me off to a man with six kids along with my daughter for Rs. 20,000 After five years, he came to take me back, but people around me started shaming me and the second man to whom I was sold married me. My second husband took good care of me when he was alive. He gave me a dignified life and a name in society. However, after his death, his children and my only daughter started beating and abusing me, threatened me with dire consequences, and forced me to sign property papers. I used to cry, but the children were not moved by my plight. They wanted me to move out of the house. It felt terrible, because life changed at the drop of a hat. The position and respect that was given to me was snatched away from me and I was stricken with all kinds of grief.”
She speaks as she raises some important questions about respect, identity and pain. “Words cannot explain the grief that I have experienced. My heartbreaks when I think of that pain, nobody can understand what I have gone through. I cry thinking about how my own children treated me. I was old, frail and illiterate. I used to pray to God that some angel would come from somewhere and take me away from this pain.In a country like India, a young widow can get married and have a life of change whereas an old widow is thrown into a life of hell.”
For her, Maitri is a home. “Maître has helped me overcome all the pain. I never feel lonely or alone here, and the environment here gives me solace and makes me remember my childhood days." Maître wants to rather thankyou , because your support has helped us provide such a home and has brought attention to such stories of struggles and victories.
Your contribution also ensures that the widow mothers live in healthy and hygienic environment. They have clean rooms, clean beds, and maintain personal hygiene, which is necessary for a healthy life.
With your partnership, we are enabling about 55 widows are in Radhakund’s Maitri Ghar and 66 widows are in Vrindavan Maitri Gharto live with dignity and respect. We also have 3 non-resident widows at Radha Kund who come for Lunch and Milk distribution. 7185 meals and 2266 fruits were served to the widows..In the month of July, 365 widows from Vrindavan and Radha Kund were taken to the hospital for checkup and medications. 6 Health camps have beenorganized.
Thank you for being our pillar of strength! Thank you for being instrumental in sharing these stories of struggles and shaping journeys of victories along with the widows of Vrindavan and RadhaKund.
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