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Help women victims of Domestic Violence in India

by Sambhali Trust
Help women victims of Domestic Violence in India
Help women victims of Domestic Violence in India
Help women victims of Domestic Violence in India
Help women victims of Domestic Violence in India
Help women victims of Domestic Violence in India
Help women victims of Domestic Violence in India
Help women victims of Domestic Violence in India
Help women victims of Domestic Violence in India
Help women victims of Domestic Violence in India
Help women victims of Domestic Violence in India
Help women victims of Domestic Violence in India
Help women victims of Domestic Violence in India
Help women victims of Domestic Violence in India
Help women victims of Domestic Violence in India

In the light of these uncertain times and in line with the action taken by the Indian and Rajasthani goverments to contain the spread of Covid-19, Sambhali Trust has now closed all its projects as from 16 March 2020 until further notice. We hope and pray that India is able to contain the virus and it does not spread further into the community. We also hope that families are able to pull together in this crisis and that stories of domestic violence and verbal abuse disappear in the shadow of this national emergency. 

We thank you all for your generous donations.

 

Case Stories from December 2019-February 2020

PK Domestic Violence

P called Sambhali’s HelpLine, to talk about her sister whose husband drinks too much and beats her and she is being tortured by him. P and her sister were married at the same time in the same village 10 years ago. Her sister’s mother-in-law and her husband abused her sister starting after one year of marriage. P’s sister thought he would improve gradually but his bad habits continued to grow. One night her husband beat her sister enough to cause her to bleed. P took her sister to her house, but her husband dragged her from P’s home back to his own house. After all this P was very upset and said he wanted her sister to take this case to the police, but she can’t leave the house. Sambhali’s counsellor gave the number of the Police HelpLine that P should use and suggested that she called them and gave them all the information.

 

V Domestic Abuse

V phoned from Jaipur about her mother, who is suffering from abuse. She said her mother worked throughout the day and even though her health was not good, she is made to work all day long. She is also abused even after getting the work done.  V’s mother’s sister-in-law bothers her a lot and sometimes also beats her, because she has no husband to protect her. These atrocities have been increasing on a daily basis.

V asked Sambhali that she wanted to complain against her mother’s sister-in-law. Sambhali’s counsellor advised her to call the Police Women’s HelpLine in Jaipur and made a complaint so that immediate action can be taken against them. Sambhali gave her the number to call and empowered V to fight against this injustice.

 

NS Domestic Abuse

N called from Alwar and said she was worried about her family life. She said she was married to someone called G. 8 years ago. After one year her mother-in-law started harassing her a lot. Her husband listened to everything from his mother and does everything according to what she says. Troubled by all these things she went to her parents in Alwar. Currently she is a chartered accountant in Jaipur and earning a good income. Lastly her husband put up a case of citation in court in 2017 and N herself has put cases against her husband on dowry and harassment, but these cases are still going on in court and a lot of money has been spent on lawyers.

Sambhali’s counsellor advised her to go to the Legal Aid office in Alwar court and tell her all her problems. They would be able to provide legal aid for those in difficult finances and provide lawyers to fight her case.

 

AS Other

AS called to say that she is very upset about her husband. She has been married for 4 years and has a child of 5months. Her in-laws live in Bharatpur, but her husband took her from Bharatpur to Baroda and lived with her for some time and then went to find work in Jaipur or Jodhpur on 2 December. On 6 December she got a call to say that he had found work and after a few days he would call her when he had settled and ask them to join him. However, the call never came and his phone was switched off. AS tried to call her father-in-law, but her didn’t respond either. AS went with her own father to the police but nothing has been taken further. She came to Sambhali to ask for advice how to make a complaint so the police can take action. The counsellor advised her to make an application and present it directly to the Superintendent of Police and say that action is not being taken in her local police station. In this case, where no action is being taken by local police, there is provision to appear directly to the higher police authority. In this way, the counsellor was able to calm the person down and inform her of a way that she would be able to get action from the police.

 

J Medical

J has been working in the Graduate Sewing Centre for 2 years. Her son, A, became very ill due to pneumonia and was admitted to hospital, but needed financial help. So Sambhali, after looking at her financial position was able to help her buy the necessary medication by giving her 1071 rupees, (about a week’s income).

 

 


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Some more stories from our SOS counsellor:

 

SS Domestic Abuse

SS called and wanted to talk about her sister S. She has been married for 2 years and lives with her husband separately from her in-laws. A few months after her marriage her husband started harassing her. SS said he brought his sister to his house after one month and S went back to her husband and he apologised. After that her husband continued to harass her in the same way. Now SS says that S’s husband has said if SS comes to pick up her sister again, she must sign divorce papers.

S asked Sambhali advice what to do. The Sambhali counsellor advised S that he shoud write a complaint to the police so that if there was any kind of aggression when SS went to pick up his sister, that S would be safe in case of a fight. If S’s husband beat someone up then the police could take action against him.  

 

D Domestic Abuse/Harassment

MD came to Sambhali with her son. She was very worried about her daughter P, who was an ex-student of Sambhali. M said that her daughter had been married for 17 years and has 2 sons. Her husband has an illicit relationship with another woman after 4 years of marriage. He disappeared from home for 2 years and then returned with the woman and their child. At that point, he ended the relationship with P and started living separately with his new family. Now he is harassing P for the last year to get out of the house.  P’s mother was very upset about his and came to Sambhali for advice.

Sambhali’s counsellor felt that P needed legal advice and referred her to a local advocate in Jodhpur, who had done some voluntary work with Sambhali already, by giving a workshop to the women in empowerment centres. After hearing this case, the advocate, asked P to file the case in court and asked P to make a statement infront of the Magistrate. He said he would fight P’s case without asking for any fees.

OD and MD – Medical

OD lives in Setrawa, a rural village in the Thar desert area of Rajasthan, 100km west of Jodhpur and has been suffering from an illness for the last 3 months. She had taken medicine from the doctors in the village, but her health had not recovered. Gradually her weakness increased and she started to feel very dizzy.  She has 3 children and her husband also not well and so is unable to earn much money. Because of this, she could not come to Jodhpur and take medicine from a good doctor so she sought financial help from Sambhali to get some good medicine.

Sambhali invited her to come to Jodhpur to the Raj Dadiji Hospital where they carried out investigations. Her blood tests showed that she was anaemic and they gave her some medicine. Now she is feeling much better again.

Another lady in Setrawa called MD had very similar medical issues and was also invited to the hospital to have blood tests and provided with medicine for her anaemia.

 

K. Domestic Abuse

K came to the Sambhali office as she was feeling very distraught. She said she had been married for 10 years, but she is not happy. Her husband kept torturing her all the time because she has not had any children yet. She also got medical treatment but in vain. Someone advised her to do some religious rituals and remedies to be able to help her conceive. In order to do this she needed to take a loan with her husband’s permission and started doing these rituals.  She took a loan of 70,000rs but it soon increased to 1 Lakh rupees because of compound interest. When her husband got to know about this, there was a lot of fighting and he beat her. Her husband threatened her that if this money wasn’t paid by her parents, then he would divorce her. He fought her and removed her from his house and sent her to Jodhpur (to her parents) and said he would not take her back until her parents had paid the money. K doesn’t want to divorce her husband.

Sambhali’s counsellor relaxed her through counselling and provided moral support, saying that she is very well educated and she earns an income. K was referred to the advocate for legal advice and she felt much better talking to him.

JD Domestic Abuse

JD came to the Sambhali office after a recommendation from an acquaintance. She is about 70 years old and has 2 sons and 3 daughters. All 3 daughters are married; one son is married and one son is mentally weak. She lives in a house with both sons (and son’s family) , that was built by her husband. Her daughter-in-law fights with JD and causes JD’s son to have a rift with his mother and fight with her also.  One day he beat his mother and expelled her from the house and said that he would not let her stay there or call the house in her name.

Sambhali asked the advocate for legal advice, who asked JD to file an application and put it to the commissioner’s office so the police can take action against her eldest son.

 

 


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A few more case stories over the last 3 months, which illustrate the type of calls we receive and the help we give.

 


JC Domestic Violence

After a distressed phonecall from JC, she came to the Sambhali office with her mother.
JC has a good education and a government job and has been married to RC for nineteen years.
After one year of marriage she gave birth to their son. At this time she started to receive many forms of abuse from her in-laws regarding the dowry, which her husband supported.
After a few years of marriage, her husband began an affair with another woman who works in his office. He often does not come home for four days at a time and switches his phone off.

He denies the affair when JC confronts him and this causes many fights.
This has led to JC becoming depressed and no longer fulfilling her own abilities.

Through counselling, JC was able to talk through the problems, and to be heard.
She was given advise to get out of the house and use the good education she has, to not spend time worrying about a husband who does not worry about her, she must remember she has loving and supportive parents and she must use her education to better herself and become financially independent and to focus her time and attention on the life and future of her son.
This may inspire her husband to better himself too.

With Sambhali’s support her self-esteem is much improved and she now feels empowered and motivated to go and live a better life for herself and the future of her son.

 

 

K Verbal Harassment

K called from Jaipur after receiving a series of harassing phone calls and vulgar WhatsApp messages from the same person, using many different numbers.
She was asking for advice if anything can be done, because she is very anxious and unable to sleep due to such mental stress.

Sambhali informed her that cyber crime is a real crime and is becoming An increasing issue these days. Support was given to encourage her to go to the police and report this. And we informed her there is actually a cyber crime office in Jaipur where she will be taken seriously and such offenders will be traced and punished.

Sambhali gave proper advice and moral support, helping this girl to be relieved of mental stress.

 

 

S Sexual Harassment

S came to Sambhali office with her sister-in-law asking for advice.
Her husband drinks too much alcohol and does not earn much money. S is earning money herself, by cleaning people’s homes for the monthly home expenses.

Her husband’s elder brother who lives nearby, comes into the house at night, sexually harming her. He threatens that if she does not make a physical relationship with him he will pour acid on her. When she had the courage to tell her husband of his brother’s threats her husband scolded her questioning why she would want to deframe his brother.

Feeling disturbed by the situation S asked for help. Sambhali was able to support her by telling her not to be frightened and supported her to go to the police. The police have investigated the case and her husband and his brother have been barred.

She states expressly that she does not want to live with her husband. She can live alone and support her children with her own money.

In this way Sambhali provided assistance to a woman suffering from sexual harassment, provided moral support and helped motivate her to live a new and happy independent life.

 

 

NS Medical

NS is a previous student of Sambhali, she finished her studies eight years ago and now has two children. She has recently been diagnosed with arthritis after investigations.
Her husband is also sick and is in financial difficulty. Her treatment is expected to last a long time and she does not have the money for this.

With these considerations Sambhali agreed to assist her financially for six months with 6000rs per month for her medical care, enabling an economically disadvantaged woman, one of our own Sambhali girls, to receive good health care and lead a healthy life.

 

 

M Domestic Violence

SK called regarding her cleaning lady M who had confided her husband was drinking too much alcohol and beating her. M lives with her in-laws and her husband who is not earning any money, only spending the money M earns for the family on alcohol. She tries to talk to him about the alcohol but he only beats her, even in public and her in-laws support him.

She does not want to go to the police as she fears living alone but is asking for help in counselling her husband.
Sambhali were able to connect M with a women’s police helpline in Jaipur who can give her advice and will also talk to her husband, and advise him if he does not comply with the help they offer him then an official complaint can be made against him.

In this way, this woman has the support to change her situation, without fear, to lead a safe life.

 

 

RY Verbal Harassment

RY called, upset because a boy she made friends with is blackmailing her to marry him.
She accepted a social media friendship request from the boy a year previously, and they had become friends, then exchanged phone numbers and started talking on the phone.
At his force, she agreed to meet him and they met a few times at a restaurant. As she got to know him, she realised he was not an educated boy, he was in fact a vagabond and she did not want to spend a life with this boy.

She was upset because she found herself in a situation completely out of hand and hadn’t confided her family.
Sambhali was able to give support and advice to go to the boys mother to explain his blackmailing and stop him, and to go to her own mother.

Thus freeing her from stress and anxiety.

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A few more case stories over the last 3 months, which illustrate the type of calls we receive and the help we give.

 

B.P and A.M    Domestic abuse

B.P brought her friend, A.M, to Sambhali Office who wanted to talk about his daughter, M. 7 months ago, she got married to a business man, J.C, who has a lot of money; it is the second marriage of this man (divorced once before). After marriage, he did not allow his wife (A.M’s daughter) to come back home before 3 months have passed so her father decided to go and visit her in her house. At the beginning, JC (husband) was only scolding his wife on small matters but he became more and more violent (physically and verbally) so M moved back to her parents’ house. Now, she is 3 months pregnant and A.M is scared to send back his daughter as, in an act of violence, the husband could badly hurt both his daughter and future grandchild. Thus, he reached to the husband and his family to get guarantees regarding his daughter’s security but wanted more advise on what to do. The counsellor advised A.M to take his daughter to a women’s police station and fill a complaint so the husband would be summoned by the police and could be stopped from hurting his wife.

 

J.    Domestic violence

J. called from Jaipur to report a woman living at the Jaipur Railway Station with no food for the last 3 to 4 days. She knew the woman was a victim of domestic violence and fled home. She asked the HelpLine how to assist her. As she called Jodhpur HelpLine, the counsellor gave her the number of Jaipur’s so she could contact them directly. Then they could help the woman get to a safe place like Nari Niketan.

 

J.    Verbal harassment

J. called on behalf of his sister the HelpLine as she is really upset with her ex-husband. After a 2 years marriage, his sister obtained a divorce from the Court and went back home to live with her parents and brother. But it did not stop her ex-husband from calling her to make threats of abuse and even murder her. Because she obtained a legal divorce, J. was advised by our counsellor to accompany his sister to the police station with divorce papers in order to file an official complaint so then the police could take actions against the abusive husband.

 

P.    Medical

P. works at Fatima Graduate Centre and was diagnosed with stage 1 cancer one year ago. She is now undertaking treatment (chemotherapy) to prevent the spread of the disease and eradicate it. But the problem was that treatment is really expensive and her father does not have a good financial situation and she has siblings to be taken care for. She called Sambhali to ask for help covering the cost (30 000 INR) of treatment and half was offered to her. She will now be able to go to Ahmedabad to follow her treatment thanks to economic and emotional support from Sambhali.

 

R.P    Sexual harassment

R.P called the HelpLine regarding his 9 years old daughter receiving very inappropriate calls, texts and videos from boys. He is a gardener in a school and live with his family in Delhi. It is not the first time he reached for help as he already called the Child HelpLine and addressed a complaint to the police but nothing was done. Indeed, he is now pressured by the police to withdraw his complaint as the boys come from a wealthy family, itself pressuring the police to drop the case. The boys managed to trick his daughter into giving them her mother’s phone number and started to send porn videos but as she is only 9 years old, she doesn’t understand what she is watching and keep on doing it. Then, they started calling her to make inappropriate proposal (sexual harassment). To react, R.P wanted to know if it would be a good idea to talk about it on social medias. The counsellor provided moral support to a miserable father and advised R.P to go to a women’s police station and fill another complaint to a woman officer so then measures could be taken.


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A few more case stories over the last 3 months, which illustrate the type of calls we receive and the help we give

Case Stories

L          Domestic Violence

B called from Beawar in Rajathan and said that her sister L was very upset. L lives in Jaipur and her husband has recently died. However, since that date she has received a lot of abuse and torture from her in-laws over the property and whose name it should be in. Her father-in-law earns 50,000rs pension but doesn’t help L out with any money. She looks after herself, does her own work and looks after the children.  Because L lives in Jaipur, then the Sambhali counsellor needed to provide her with the number of the women’s HelpLine in Jaipur and explain the story to them and that if they do not take this on board, to file a complaint with the police regarding her situation with her in-laws.

 

U        Medical

U has been working at the Graduates’ Sewing Centre for the last year and for the last 2-3 months, has been suffering from arthritis in her hands. The fingers in her hands had swelled up and it was causing her a lot of trouble with her sewing work. She had been to the doctor, but the medicines he had prescribed didn’t help her. Due to the high cost of medicines and the medical investigation required she could not afford it, so requested Sambhali’s help.  U has 3 daughters and her husband doesn’t do any work. Assessing her financial situation, Sambhali offered her financial assistance and gave her the details of a good doctor she could use. After taking the medicines, she is now healthy and she can continue to do her sewing work well.

P     Medical

P was a taxi driver but lost his job a few months ago. His parents have both died and only has one sister, who is married. She has had obstetrics problems and after a lot of treatment she managed to conceive. Her husband is working but their financial situation is not very good. So P supported his sister to that she could receive treatment, but in the meantime he lost his job.  At the time of delivery it was necessary for his sister to have a Caesarean section to deliver the baby. This was something that his sister and her husband could ill-afford, so P and his sister came to Sambhali to ask for assistance and pay for the surgery. Sambhali paid her 25000 rupees for the surgery.

 

S    Forced Marriage

K rang to say that a girl called S was being forced to marry someone she didn’t want to and so K gave S the number so she rang the HelpLine and spoke with our Sambhali counsellor.  She said she has an arranged marriage but wants to study further, besides she and K are in love and wish to marry but their parents don’t approve because they are from different castes. S’s father has stopped her from going to college and imprisoned her in the house and wishes her to marry someone who is 10 years older than her. S therefore is very upset and cannot just leave her house with K because of their poor circumstances.   S asked for advice so that she could get married to K.  Our counsellor advised that this could only be done through Legal Aid and with the help of the law. At every district level there are district legal services authority centre where there is free legal advice given. K can go there and tell the magistrate the whole story and provide the information required to obtain a court marriage.

 

R     Domestic Abuse

R came with her sister to the Sambhali office. She said that she was very upset with her married life. She said she was married 20 years ago at the age of 10 and she said she has never been happy in her marriage and now she is a victim of mental and sexual harassment. She has gynaeacological problems and so she can’t have children. Then she adopted the daughter of her sister-in-law with the consent of the family. Her husband built them a house, in which R lives and is legally in her name. R went on to say that her husband has had many affairs with other women and many times he brings them to the house. She feels very bad about this but when she discusses this with her husband he abuses and beats her and threatens to kick her out of the house.  Harassed by all this , R filed a police case.

The case is still going on in court, but her father-in-law threatens to come and remove her from the house. R said she has no parents, so there is no-one to support her.  R gave Sambhali her husband’s number to let him know that he shouldn’t and couldn’t threaten R because the house is in her name. R felt better after the conversation and was advised further that she has nothing to fear because Sambhali would always support her in full.

 

S  Domestic Abuse

S called from Bhiwari in Rajasthan, upset about her marriage. She had a love marriage and 2 children. However, her husband has a relationship with many young girls. Many times she has caught her husband and when challenged he fights with her, beats her and drags her out of the house. Her husband runs his own business and does some driving work.  However, S doesn’t want to get divorced, nor does she want to leave her husband.

Sambhali advised her if she does not want to get divorced she will have to stay strong and need to think less about her husband and more about her children. She has to make the future of her children. She needs to work to financially support herself and so she needs to get a job. She has done a BBA, (Bachelor in Business Administration)  so that means she can get a job easily. If her husband tries to stop her she needs to get out and go out and keep continuing to go to work. This way the counsellor repeatedly said that S needs to go to work. After counselling, S felt very relaxed to seeing a vision of her future which showed her a way forward.


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Organization Information

Sambhali Trust

Location: Jodhpur, Rajasthan - India
Website:
Facebook: Facebook Page
Twitter: @SambhaliTrust
Project Leader:
Govind Rathore
Jodhpur, Rajasthan India

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