SK Domestic Abuse
S came to the Sambhali office with her uncle, who is a friend of her father. He spoke to our counsellor and said that S was very upset in her marital life. Her in-laws harass her. He went on to say that she had been married for 10 years and has a 5 year old son. After 2 years of marriage everything was fine but then the in-laws and husband changed their behaviour and started to mentally torture her. They drank alcohol and verbally abused her together with her husband also drinking alcohol and beating her. For a long time, S continued to live this life, but when her child became old enough to go to school, she found that her husband didn’t do anything to arrange for her child’s education. Battles and fighting ensued between her and her husband and in the end, distressed by all the bad behaviour, she took her son to her father’s house. She wants her son to go to school and she wants to become self-sufficient herself, (she studied at school up to 8th Class).
Sambhali discussed with her the possibility of her attending the Graduates Sewing Centre in Sambhali to learn to sew garments and items on a fast-track basis in 2-months, after which time she could start to earn a living by producing stock for the Sambhali boutique. She is now attending the centre and feeling much better with her new life.
A and F. Domestic Abuse and Harassment
A and F are 2 sisters and came to the Sambhali office with their mother and aunt. They have been married for 4 years to 2 brothers, but they find they are unable to stay in their in-laws house for more than a month at a time. Both husbands drink alcohol and beat them and kick them out of the house. The husbands have had extra marital affairs with other women and F’s husband ran away with a minor girl, for which he is now in jail. Whenever they go to the in-laws house, where their husbands live, they suffer severe mental harassment and A’s husband asks them to do illegal work.
Both sisters are very upset by this behaviour and want a divorce from their husbands, to which their mother also agrees this is the best option. However, their economic situation is not good and hasn’t been able to allow them to go through the legal proceedings. So they came to Sambhali asking for advice. Our Sambhali counsellor advised them that there is a Legal Services Help Centre in the High Court, where free legal advice and assistance are provided. Our counsellor also spoke to one of the staff at the Legal Services Help Centre and explained the situation. The next day F and A and their parents went to the Centre to discuss their case using the free legal aid offered to them.
C Forced Marriage
C called from a village in the Ganganagar district to say she was very upset and unhappy. She explained that she was 17 years old and her family wants to marry her forcefully, but she wants to get a better future by getting a good education. The person whom she was intended to marry was 11 years older than her and she didn’t want to marry him. Her mother also didn’t wish for her to marry him, but because of her financial situation, C’s grandmother was pressurising her mother to go ahead with the marriage. Her father has psychiatric problems and is in a hospital. C explained even if she looked for help in the village, the police would not help her because of the influence of her grandmother.
Sambhali suggested that C go to the District Court in Ganganagar, where she will be able to find the District Legal Services Authority, where she can pursue their help to stop the marriage because she is not yet 18 years old, lower than the minimum age to get married.
N. Domestic Abuse
J called from Mumbai about his sister, N. His sister lives in Rajasthan and has been married for 15 years and has 2 children. Her husband works at the mobile shop in the local town. For the last 2-3 years, N’s husband has been troubling her and torturing her in every way. His sister has been phoning her mother regularly asking for advice. Now N’s husband has started assaulting J’s sister and she is becoming more and more stressed and very depressed by all her husband’s behaviour.
J asked Sambhali for advice on how to prevent her husband inflicting this abuse onto his sister. Sambhali’s counsellor suggested to J. that N’s husband should be given the opportunity of counselling at least once to see if this could make a difference. He was given the number of the Police Women’s Help Line in Jaipur near their home town, so that he could talk to them and arrange for them to give counselling to his sister’s husband and at the same time put pressure on him to stop being violent. If her husband does not improve with his counselling, then a complaint could be filed with the police there.
S Domestic Violence
S called and said that she was very upset with a family problem. She came into the office the next day with her mother to speak to our counsellor andt explained that she had been married for 4 years and had a 3 year old daughter. Her marriage was a love marriage and also an inter-caste marriage. Her father had died before their marriage and in his place she got a government job on the Railways. For this reason her mother and elder unmarried sister live in the Railways quarters with her. Her husband wanted her mother and sister to live elsewhere, but this is not possible, because she got her job and living quarters instead of her father, so she cannot leave her mother and sister alone.
Many times the fight got so much, that her husband attacked her. Two days beforehand, her husband had got beaten up and ran away from home. S asked our Sambhali counsellor for advice as to how to have a settled family life. The Counsellor asked for her husband’s telephone number and she invited them both together for a discussion. S’s husband complained that S only looked after her own family and didn’t want to go his parents’ house at all. After much discussion, it was decided that both of them would need to learn to respect the parents of the other and that at least once a month, S should go to her husband’s village with her husband to visit his parents. The counsellor also stated that S’s husband should respect S’s parents and allow them to remain with them. She also explained that their 3 year old child needed both a mother and father, so that they should work on their relationship for the sake of their child.Attachments: