Gender Equality Malaysia Project #8346

Refuge for abused women in Malaysia

by Women's Aid Organisation (WAO)

Project Report | Jun 16, 2020
A Rescue Mission during the Movement Control Order (MCO)

By Joanne Melissa Wong | Head of Programmes

“Nellie” (not her real name), a 21-year-old domestic violence survivor contacted WAO hotline at 9.30pm on May 19th, 2020 requesting for shelter. She was afraid to return home earlier in the evening, after being forced by her family to withdraw a police report she made against her husband, for domestic abuse.

After a quick assessment to get more information on the case, WAO learned that “Nellie” was forced by her very own family, into an arranged marriage.

She was married off on March 14th, 2020, just four days before the Movement Control Order (MCO) - lockdown in Malaysia - was enforced.

The abuse started on the fifth day of marriage when her husband hit her on her chest with his head. It didn’t end there as the abuse only got worse.

A day before she contacted WAO, her newly-wed husband had pushed her and pinned her against a wall. He then punched her on her chest and hit her with his hand.

“Nellie” suffered injuries to her head and chin; her hand was bleeding. Her husband threatened to hunt her down and kill her if she tried to run away from him. Fortunately “Nellie” found the courage to make a police report after going to stay with her cousin in another suburb the next day.

She said she found it difficult to leave her abusive marriage as her family was in favour of her husband; they had, after all, arranged her marriage. She couldn’t confide in them and received no support from them either.

Three hours after returning home from her cousin’s, “Nellie” called WAO to say that she could not leave her abusive marriage and would be uncontactable thereafter, as it was unsafe for her to connect with us.

But the following day, she called a WAO Social Worker on duty at 4pm, expressing her intention to leave that night. A safety plan was drawn up and WAO briefed her. She in turn said she would inform WAO when she found a safe time to leave that night.

A WAO team on standby did not hear from “Nellie” that night. We could not call the police either as WAO respects a victim’s privacy and decision as they may not be ready to leave a situation yet.

On May 21st, 2020, a WAO Social Worker on-call receives a message from “Nellie” saying she had a window of opportunity to make an escape but had to leave specifically at 3.30am.

She snuck out of her flat, under the nose of her unsupportive mother who was at home. WAO made arrangements for a taxi to wait for her near her flat and ferry her to a WAO Shelter.

On arrival at the shelter around 4.30am, “Nellie” was seen to be unable to walk and had to be carried into the shelter. It was visible that her leg on one side was completely twisted and was swelling. When probed, she said in order to escape, she had to jump from the balcony of her flat on the first floor.

As a representative of WAO and a woman myself, I was totally lost for words that a 21-year old woman had to jump to save herself from her abusive husband during the lockdown.

Arrangements were made for “Nellie” to be taken to the hospital where we were informed that she required surgery having suffered multiple fractures on her four toes. She was recently discharged from the hospital and is in safe hands at a WAO shelter where she is cared for and is being assisted with case management.

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Oct 8, 2019
Finally A Safe and Secure Place to Thrive

By Kiran Kaur | Social Worker, Women's Aid Organisation Malaysia

WAO recognises the right to safety at all times.

Mei Lee and her two kids Shi Hui, 9 years old and Shi Liu, 6 years old were admitted to WAO shelter in June 2019. A had been exposed to physical and financial abuse since 2015. Although her children, Shi Hui and Shi Liu were not directly abused, they witnessed the abuse at times. As a result of being in an abusive environment and trauma exposure, when Mei Lee and her family first came to WAO, she felt very vulnerable and fearful, as her husband had tried to contact her friends she was previously staying with to find out her location. He additionally threatened he would harm her friends, and told them he would kill her if he managed to locate her. She hoped that coming to WAO shelter following receiving this threats would increase her feeling of security for her and her children.

When Mei Lee and her children came to WAO, her primary concern of safety and security was acknowledged and proactively addressed. WAO managed to obtain an IPO and then a PO that covered both Mei Lee and her kids. Following getting this protection, she gradually regained her sense of security for her and her kids, and progressively felt like she could start taking control of her life once again. She actively participated in counselling sessions as well as empowerment programmes, and her kids were delighted to have the opportunity to be homeschooled, and be involved in the various sports and other intellectually stimulating and skill building programmes.

With secured legal protection for Mei Lee and her kids and the skills they had learnt from their participation in WAO programmes, Mei Lee soon gained the confidence to start looking at places she could move to outside of the refuge to build a future for her and her kids. She developed a plan with her social worker and acted on the plan by visiting a few places and engaging her friends to help her secure a place. When she and her children left the shelter, they felt empowered and supported. It was evident that the combination of a safe refuge, legal protection, and psychosocial, physical and intellectual programs had thoroughly benefited A and her family in terms of supporting and empowering them as a family unit to be able to move forward with their lives.

Links:

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Jun 10, 2019
Supporting Survivors Beyond Providing Shelter

By Ee Lin | Social Worker, Women's Aid Organisation Malaysia

Supporting Survivors Beyond Refuge

Alia, aged 39 years old, is from the northern Malaysian state of Kedah, which about 6 hours away from Kuala Lumpur. She came to WAO’s shelter in January 2019 with her 9 year old son, Azmi, to escape her abusive situation. She had endured physical and emotional abuse by her husband throughout her marriage of 14 years. Multiple police reports were made against her husband for domestic abuse but the police in Kedah chose not to take any action.

In November 2018, her husband hit her multiple times with a metal pipe and threatened to kill her. She had suffered not only tremendous physical injuries but the mental torture of living in fear for her life was unbearable. Alia had then filed a police report but the police dismissed the abuse as a household matter. They encouraged her to talk things out with her husband amicably.

In December 2018, Alia's husband held a knife to her son’s throat and threatened that he will take his life if she refused to give him her money. A police report was made but again, the police did not take any action. Countless times the system had failed Alia and her son Azmi from the protection they deserved. Alia was resilient and wanted to break free from the cycle of violence and to save herself and her son’s life. She wanted a chance at a happier life. She had heard of Women’s Aid Organisation (WAO) through a friend and had immediately made contact to seek help from her abusive situation. Alia had called the WAO hotline and within 2 days, she and her son were on their way to Kuala Lumpur by bus heading to WAO’s shelter.

Alia and Azmi arrived safely to WAO’s shelter in January 2019. With the help from WAO’s amazing team of social workers, the police in Kedah re-opened their investigations in February 2019. Alia’s husband was finally arrested and charged in court for domestic violence in May 2019. Alia and her son Azmi were also granted a protection order by the court.

Alia enjoys cooking and her dream is to open a restaurant oneday. Under the Sustainable Development Program at Women’s Aid Organisation whereby residents at the shelter are encouraged to enrol into developmental programs to learn new skills or enhance their skills to further support their new life away from violence. Alia was enrolled as a kitchen apprentice in a café and she was recently accepted as a permanent staff. She has started preparing dishes for customers and she is reported to be happy working there. Her self-confidence has increased tremendously and she experiences peace of mind at all times in her safety and her son's safety. Her son Azmi, has been going for child therapy to support him in his anger and resentment towards all the abuse and to channel his anger in a healthier manner. He is doing well and has made new friends. Both mother and son are thriving.

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