Navrat: Lets find every child in Slovakia a family

For families, who took in children with special needs, we were providing service called „relieve service“. Parents, who take care of children who require special and very intensive care, are often exhausted. This can lead to their total collaps. We are offering to these parents some time for themself - as a prevention of their collaps. Trained volunteers spend time with children while parents have time to rest and relax, or spent time alone as a couple. This service is very important, because while volunteers are spending quality time with children, their parents can gatherstrength to be able to continue taking care of their children with new energy.

We are thankful to our donors, that we could also buy new toys for our special playground. This playground is place where children play with their adoptive/foster parents. Children are playing their own way, and we teach parents to respond to it correctly. Everything that parents do or say during the game, tells kids that they see and accept them. This therapy has some rules and for parents it´s hard work, because it is not enough to learn some "formula" but parents must stay themselves all the time. Because children, and particular those who have experiences difficult situation in the past, have limited options to express when they are having trouble. Thanks to the support of donors we were able to add special toys to our playground – various sandboxes, and bowls for the sand, rise and other masses in which they could bury, a frog to be transformed into prince, various figurines of birds, dress for the princess and others. Thanks to this special toys and way of playing with children, which we are teaching the parents, children can express themself despite the difficult childhood experiences.

During the year we were visiting families also in their homes. Because they live in villages in different parts of Slovakia, but in principle, far from professional help. We were traveling to various destinations and help them as consultats and therapists at their homes. We were visiting them also to see how are their doing and how the relationship between child and adoptive/foster parents is developing. This we are able to see when the family is in their natural circumstances and parents are more relaxed than in our premises and children are less shy. During the time, when we meet with families in their home, we give them practical counseling in daily situations they share with us.

A story about children that were found

We write quite little about the mediation service for substitute family care for children because it is not provided too frequently. It is actually rather scarce and rare. To provide mediation service means something close to looking for diamonds in mines or sieving the gold-bearing mud and gravel from a river. Should we, however, not provide it, Návrat would not be what it is. Daniela Vráblová from Návrat Center in Prešov wrote about this kind of work.

“Some time back, I wrote a story about the lost and forgotten little Hanka. Not only was I left sore from the content of the article itself, but from myself too. I was angry with myself. Why am I being so critical and negative when writing about this wonderful service? That was when I promised myself that I would also write about the beautiful part of it because I am witnessing new relationships being born in front of me. And therefore, here it comes... A story about children that were found.

When I joined Návrat after a short and quite dreary experience while working at children’s home, my task, among others, was to provide mediation service for substitute families. It was a step into the unknown – a view from the opposite perspective. We made up somewhat of a list and among all the files in the card index, I even found reports from children I had known from the children’s home – my previous workplace! All of a sudden, giving those children a chance to live in a family turned real. It took me a while until I found my way and the first tries might have seemed a bit bashful. When it eventually worked, I frankly ended up feeling a bit disappointed from all that enthusiasm. ... because there were no other parents waiting behind the door to look for their baby.

We have worked with many children since then. Some of them successfully found their new families. Only later on have I encountered a file with statements from the adopted children. One of them caught my eye: “I don’t remember anyone from my childhood, but I would like to know whether anyone remembers me.” It sounded as if it said one of the children we worked with in mediation service! The way my parents remember the circumstances around my birth, I remember the circumstances around their “birth” to their new parents.

Matej was firstly meant to be a desired daughter but those extraordinary ears will be found nowhere else, ever! On the other hand, Perla, a little girl in a picture where she hugs a big teddy bear made it even in the high competition of new-borns.

It was the one and only time that the hoya in our office blossomed when I showed the little Igor to his new parents.

And Šimon – when I had originally been looking for a sister in a family who have already been foster parents to a boy. I showed the family a few girls and one little handsome boy. They looked through the files, then they went for a walk and came back with the final decision – Šimon. When I had the opportunity to meet him after several years, he was way taller than his foster mom (and me). A handsome boy; he and his brother love each other – in the brotherly kind of way.

Another new mom didn’t even need to see the one-month-old Julko in a picture up front. All I told her about him was just enough for her to know that they will love just and only him – even without any photo documentation.

There were also children without a name, but they are unforgettable too. I remember how one new mom proudly named the little blue-eyed baby girl Alexandra and how a little stubby baby boy became Julián. A new family brought their two-months-old Erik home on my birthday and I was the first person from their community they showed him to. I couldn’t have wished for any other gift.

The whole process (mediation, interactions and proceedings at court) of the little Norbik must have been accompanied by angels. I have never witnessed such efficient and homogeneous proceedings of public authorities, court and all the other stakeholders before. It took no longer than a month that he was in his new home. Even the heavens must have wished for his new parents to take him in. However, Norbik wasn’t a healthy boy, similar to Matko, Matejko, Jozko, or Samko – originally all babies with health issues and unclear prognosis (heart, kidneys, muscular tonus, digestive system). Their new parents wanted them even if they had to bear in mind that the care for these children would require more than common parenting does. It even was that way at the very beginning; later on I was a live witness to miracles – all of them cured – by having been given love! Even medical specialists in Bratislava couldn’t believe that after two years they really see the same children. Now, in many areas, they have already preceded their peers.

We want to say to all the children out there whose destiny was entangled with Návrat in any way, whether they are 5 months or 15 years old, we remember you! Each one of you was unique, significant and charming. For me, each one of you was unforgettable!”

Daniela Vrablová

special education teacher