May 26, 2015

Juvenile Program Continues to Help Strengthen Relationships

Juvenile Program Continues to Help Strengthen Relationships
By Rae Kyritsi - Programs Director

In the past three months, CCR has served 28 additional families through its Juvenile Victim-Offender Mediation program. These 28 families have had a chance to engage in an impactful conversation about the choices made by juvenile clients and the impact these choices have on indivdiuals and neighborhoods across the Chicagoland area. These conversations strengthen community, build communication skills, restore relationships and increase understanding. The story below illustrates CCR's services through its Juvenile Victim-Offender Mediation Program:

Tina and her teenage-daughter Keira had a strong relationship. They talked all the time and both felt confident that they were good communicators who knew each other well. Then, in the Winter of 2015, Keira was arrested at school for stealing from another student’s locker and the case ended up being referred for mediation at the Center for Conflict Resolution.

The other student declined to participate in mediation, so CCR staff offered Tina and Keira the opportunity for a Family Mediation.

At the beginning of the mediation both Keira and her mother found the process laughable. “We talk every day,” they said, indicating that their regular communication meant that they had nothing to discuss with the mediator. The mediator, very experienced in family cases, persuaded the women to give it a try and began a conversation with them about their relationship, their home life, and the theft incident at school. During the mediation Tina revealed that she had traveled a hard road to come to her successes. She had been born into poverty and had suffered the physical, emotional, and psychological consequences of being poor in Chicago. By the time she was in her mid-twenties, Tina had three young children and was on her own. She vowed that her children would not struggle the way that she had and Tina persevered, creating a life for her children that was secure and safer than hers had been. Tina stated that her insistence on being involved in Keira’s life is why they spoke daily and was keeping Keira safe.

After a lot of candid discussion with Tina and Keira, the mediator decided to take a break and meet with each party separately. This part of a mediation, referred to as caucus, provides both the mediator and the parties with an opportunity to discuss topics that they might not be comfortable talking about in front of the other party. And that’s exactly what happened when the mediator met with Keira.

In caucus, Keira confessed to the mediator that she was bisexual and that she had not told her mother. The private conversation gave the mediator a chance to process with Keira what that meant and why she had wanted to keep it a secret. They talked about the possible outcomes of disclosing her sexuality to Tina and what impact it might have on their mother-daughter relationship. At the end of the caucus, Keira decided that she wanted Tina to know the truth and that she would tell her at the mediation.

When the mediator brought Tina and Keira together Keira told her mother that she was bisexual. Both the mediator and Keira waited for Tina’s response. Tina merely shrugged her shoulders and said, “You can love anybody you want, I just want you to be safe.”

At the end of the mediation, as the mediator was wrapping up the discussion, both Tina and Keira told the mediator that despite their belief that they already knew everything about each other, the mediation had been a powerful experience. Keira, unburdened from her secret, was able to have a truly open conversation with her mother for the first time in months.




May 8, 2015

CCR Expands Housing Mediation Programs!

CCR has recently expanded its Housing Mediation Programs to serve the Markham Courthouse!  Thanks to your support, since March 1, 2015 we have served more than 100 clients at Markham Courthouse. The story below is a great example of how CCR helps tenants and landlords through this program:

Belinda was a tenant in Preston’s building, and had gotten behind by several months in her rent payments. She had recently been diagnosed with cancer and was going through treatment. All of Belinda’s money was going towards paying her medical bills. Belinda assumed that Preston had plenty of resources, therefore, she didn’t give much thought to how this was impacting him – her health was her first concern.

During mediation, Preston had a chance to explain that the building wasn’t his. He was managing the property for his mother-in-law, who lived in the other unit of the two-flat building. Preston’s mother-in-law was in home hospice, and without income from the rental unit, they would be unable to afford her end-of-life care. Belinda and Preston realized the commonalities in their situation, and were able to discuss the difficulties of paying for medical care, as well as the importance of responsibility. What Preston needed most was to get a paying tenant into the building’s other unit.

Belinda and Preston were able to reach an agreement where Belinda’s past due rent was forgiven in exchange for her moving out of the unit quickly; she’d arranged to live with family, who could also help to take care of her. Without the chance to have this conversation, the situation would have ended much differently for both Belinda and Preston.

Feb 24, 2015

Continued Service to Juvenile Clients

In the past three months, CCR has served 18 additional families through its Juvenile Victim-Offender Mediation program. These 18 families have had a chance to engage in an impactful conversation about the choices made by juvenile clients and the impact these choices have on indivdiuals and neighborhoods across the Chicagoland area. These conversations strengthen community, build communication skills, restore relationships and increase understanding. The story below illustrates CCR's services through its Juvenile Victim-Offender Mediation Program:

Melissa’s parents were concerned that she had been “running with the wrong crowd.” For the last six months, she was missing her curfew and skipping classes. Her parents were worried her behavior would escalate. Then she stole a car and ran into a stop sign.

Denise was very surprised when the police called to let her know that her vehicle, left parked in front of her home, had collided with a stop sign three miles away. A teen neighbor, near in age to her own children, had stolen the car.

When the Assistant State’s Attorney told Denise that mediation was an option, she agreed to participate. Denise wanted to know why her car had been stolen and she knew that Melissa was the only one who could tell her. The judge referred the case to mediation and it was agreed that Denise, Melissa, and Melissa’s parents would attend. This case was unusual, because Melissa was still in custody and it was not clear when she would be released. A case manager for the Center for Conflict Resolution was contacted and mediation services were provided two days later at the courthouse.

In the mediation Melissa was given an opportunity to explain why she had stolen the car - she was trying to go to a friend’s funeral. Melissa had never had a chance to tell her parents where she was going. She had been grounded when she asked her parents if she might borrow their car and it had been forbidden. Desperate, Melissa took the car with plans to return it before anyone noticed.

The parties agreed that every Saturday morning Melissa will call Denise to find a time to come over later that day. Melissa agreed to go to Denise’s house for two hours every weekend to help out with chores and yard work. Denise expressed her hope that it would give Melissa a sense of responsibility as well as another place to talk about what was happening in her life.

Melissa was surprised that Denise and the mediator had asked her so many questions. She had expected the mediation to be a time where Denise might yell at her or lecture her or try to make her feel worse. Melissa told the mediator that she did not know there were adults like Denise - people who cared about children who were not their own and who were willing to help them.

Near the end of the mediation, the mediator asked Melissa what she would do the next time she had a conflict with her parents and felt lost. Melissa smiled, “I’ll call her,” she said, pointing to Denise.  

 
WARNING: Javascript is currently disabled or is not available in your browser. GlobalGiving makes extensive use of Javascript and will not function properly with Javascript disabled. Please enable Javascript and refresh this page.