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The Story of Anita*(name changed to protect identity).

Even though we have been involved with children from disadvantaged backgrounds since 1997, once in a while we still get taken aback looking at the state of the children referred to us. It makes us realize how urgently good child protection and emotional crisis management services are needed in India.

Anita* came to us in early July 2013 referred by the Child Welfare Committee. Delhi Police had found her on the streets. Her file stated that her parents died in front of her and her brother was kidnapped and hence she ran away from her home. Her real age is unknown but she seems to be around 10-11 years old.

She came to us while in acute depression but had not been under psychological treatment yet. There was extreme insecurity and aggressive behaviour. She indulged in self-harm and seeked a lot of attention. She locked herself in a room or toilet, refusing to open the door for hours and constantly threatened us with suicide. She managed to run away from our home four times and we found her in the same place that she was found by the Delhi Police initially. It was impossible to leave her alone even for a second. Many a times we wondered if we would be able to manage as we did not have a full time Counsellor on board.

Judging her needs, we sent her for regular Psychiatric treatment at one of the renowned specialized hospitals in Delhi. She is still on medication and behavioural therapy.

Our experience told us what she needed was a safe, secure loving environment where she would feel acceptance and a sense of belonging not strictness and oppressive rules. We started by giving her a lot of positive reinforcement and loads of unconditional love. We explained to the other children at the home that she had gone through a lot and needed their support. She needed a family. Our older kids took it upon themselves to do just that; and that is what it seems started to work like magic. 

Our staff provided her in house counselling and were available to her beyond the call of duty, 24x7. Our young alumni who are also our staff offered her friendship and sharing of their tough experiences. It was a very tough three months initially but gradually the walls around her started cracking. Her tears were replaced by the sweetest smile. Soon she became more involved in the daily routine. We started taking her out with all the other kids for fun outings and visits. She started forming bonds and began trusting, which was a huge step for her.

Today, Anita* has started going to school. No one who saw her a year ago would believe the progress she has made in such a short time. She greets every visitor with a bright smile. Along with taking care of herself, she looks after the younger children at the home providing them love and care. She calls Karm Marg her home and never wants to leave.

 Children like Anita* need the kind of individual attention that gets very difficult to provide in institutionalized care homes. We feel it is a great example that strengthens our belief in running a children's home like an extended family where rules, expectations and strategies are fluid and cater to every child's individual need. 

We have had many children in more dire circumstances referred to us in the past. With our experience and instinct we have successfully managed to make most of them settle and become self-reliant adults. The learning through this experience was that since we have a few young alumni and some new staff members on board now who do not have that much experience in handling acute cases, we felt we should proactively provide training to them in this regard.

So this quarter we began a counseling training workshops for all our staff conducted by the team at Sarthak, a well-known Psychotherapy Clinic run by Dr Achal Bhagat. Basic skills of handling fragile states when new children come to us, their effect on other children at the home, their emotional upheavals and adjustment problems are a few areas where this training has helped immensely.Few selected staff who work directly with the children have been earmarked to receive further specialised training too.The staff has also reported good feedback since the training adding to their own personal growth and understanding of their own pre-conceptions and emotional blocks.

 Like we always believe, we learn from children sometimes more than what we can teach them. The resilience, courage and warmth they exude motivate us to keep learning, growing and improving the care we provide. 

 Other Highlights of the Quarter!

The last quarter has been very exciting for our children at Karm Marg.

All our children have graduated to the next class and were very excited to get back to school. Shayra has passed her Class XII Board exams with 71% marks and is seeking to join a University to pursue higher education, which we are helping her with. Vipin secured 62% and has registered for a web-designing course through our network.

 The children’s summer experiences…

There have been 7 new children sent to us for short stay and 4 have been sent for long term. We are happy that we have been successful in restoring 5 children with their families and have assisted in two of our oldest ones settle independently after helping them get jobs.

 The teenagers above 14 were sent for internships keeping in mind their potential and area of interest. It varied from animal rescue center for two week training on animal care, an export unit for a month long screen printing training and our own vocational training units. One of the kids who is very interested in computers has been enrolled in a six month internship for computer hardware maintenance.

 Our youngsters with special needs did a bake sale along with children from the expat Japanese community of Delhi. They visited Karm Marg and cooked together and successfully sold the cookies at the Japanese Community event the following day.

Over the summer holidays in June, all of the children were involved in  workshops of theatre, painting, story writing, games etc. The younger ones were taken out to the zoo for a picnic and boat ride which they enjoyed immensely. Two of the older kids went to Indian Football Federation (IFF) for training as football coaches too.

Not so good news…

Unfortunately three kids came down with small pox but have recovered well.

 The unseasonal storm caused a big portion of our boundary wall to collapse and we need about USD 1000 for it’s repair. The electricity wiring of our home has also become dated and is in need of re wiring at an estimated expenditure of USD 3500.

Plans ahead…

 We always try to find ways to connect with the local community specially the youth in and around our village through various outreach programs, medical camps or workshops.

An important need of the hour is Gender Sensitization among the youth. While we are working with a few advisors on structuring the outline and details of a gender sensitization workshop, we have started reaching out to the local school teenagers. We feel that starting with fun activities is a great way to building a rapport and establishing a network with the local youth.

So as a first step, we conducted a photography workshop with class XI children at the local Senior Government school which they really enjoyed. We are hoping to take this forward in the coming months.