The Safe House: An Enclave of Peace and Hope

Dear Friends,

Before we update you with a recent story from one of our beneficiaries, this quarter we are coming to you with a big announcement. Alisa Roadcup, our Executive Director, has embarked on her next adventure and stepped down from her role at RefuSHE. For the last seven years, her passion, vision, and deep commitment to the empowerment of women and girls has elevated RefuSHE as an innovative thought leader in the field of refugee protection. We are deeply grateful for Alisa’s leadership and know that she will continue to achieve great things in the future.

As in all great stories, as one chapter ends, another begins; so it is for RefuSHE. We are very pleased to announce Jailan Adly as RefuSHE’s new Chief Executive Officer.

Jailan first joined RefuSHE’s Board of Directors in January 2018 and has most recently served in the position of Executive Strategist for the last three months. As Executive Strategist, Jailan worked alongside our organization’s senior leadership and with key stakeholders to provide continuity for the Kenya and US teams during the leadership transition. During this time, Jailan has traveled to Nairobi twice to collaborate with the Kenya team and develop a strong understanding of our award-winning holistic programming.

As an Egyptian-American, Jailan spent her childhood traveling and living between countries and cultures. That experience shaped her desire to devote her career to tackling our most complex global challenges by encouraging understanding and building impactful cross-cultural collaborations.

In addition to her deep foundational understanding of RefuSHE, Jailan has extensive experience in the realm of social impact. As a global development expert, she has spent her career building the capacity of impact-driven initiatives and organizations around the world. Her experience includes managing corporate social responsibility programs for Fortune 500 companies and forging relationships between diverse stakeholders from across the private, public, and social sectors. During her career, Jailan has worked internationally, including in Ghana, India, Indonesia, Lebanon, Morocco, South Africa, Tanzania, and Tunisia.

We are thrilled that someone with a deep history and knowledge of our organization, as well as breadth and experience in the non-profit sector, will lead RefuSHE into the future. Jailan is a consultative and visionary leader, who is committed to the empowerment of refugee girls and women and their capacity to be leaders in their communities.

This is an exciting time for RefuSHE and we are grateful for your support during the last few months of transition. Please join us in welcoming Jailan Adly as RefuSHE’s new CEO. We look forward to celebrating Jailan, RefuSHE, and our many endeavors in the months ahead.

Please continue reading below for an update from one of our Safe House beneficiaries.

In solidarity,

RefuSHE

 ***** 

“Doing the Best for Yourself” - Dembe's Story 

Dembe* is a 16-year-old young woman from Uganda who arrived in Kenya unaccompanied when she was just 14 years old. Before coming to Kenya, she lived in Jinja, Uganda with her mother, her mother’s second husband, Musan, and their two other children, Dembe’s half-siblings. When Dembe was only 8 years old, her mother contracted HIV, and passed away. Dembe continued living with her stepfather, but their relationship became strained when he began to mistreat her with extra housework. At first, Dembe dealt with the mistreatment because she had nowhere else to go, and with Musan, she at least got a meal a day and a place to sleep at night.

When Dembe was 13 years old, Musan started drinking a lot and his mistreatment of Dembe got worse. He would come home late in the night and beat Dembe before throwing her out to sleep with the goats. This affected her psychologically, and she began developing a sense of worthlessness.

Musan continued to be violent towards Dembe, and she came to expect his beatings. *Dembe said he seemed to take out all of his anger and frustration on her only.

One night, Musan came into Dembe’s room and told the other children to leave. He then attempted to rape her. Dembe noticed he was drunk and knew she had to act fast to protect herself. She found a nearby hammer hit him, stunning him long enough so she could run out through the window. She chose to leave Musan’s house for good and live on the streets of Jinja. She ate what she could find, mostly handouts from well-wishers.

One day, Dembe approached a lady who owned a hotel with a restaurant to ask for work. Though Dembe still lived on the streets, the woman had her wash dishes in exchange for food. While working there, Dembe became friends with a male hotel guest, who listened to Dembe’s hope of finding a better job as a housemaid. When the man told her that there more job opportunities in Kenya, Dembe decided she needed to leave Jinja.

Dembe set off for “Malaba”, the Uganda-Kenya border, when she was just 14 years old. She made the 141-kilometer journey on foot, walking by day and sleeping wherever she could find a free meal. It took her about 6 months to get to Malaba, but she finally reached it in January 2017. At the border, she met the same man from the hotel who was headed to Nairobi. A truck driver gave them a lift to Nairobi, and Dembe was pleased to have someone accompany her.

Upon arrival in Nairobi, the man took her to a motel in ‘Kasarani’, a neighborhood in Nairobi. He raped her that night. Out of fear and having nowhere to go, she opted to sleep next to him. In the morning, he left her with a little money and told her that a lady she would be working for would come and pick her up. The day passed, and no one came. That evening, the owner of the motel told her that the rooms were charged per day. She did not have enough money to stay, so she slept on the street that night.

The next morning, Dembe went job searching at nearby restaurants. She met a restaurant owner, Wangari*, who gave her a job where Dembe could earn about Ksh 200 daily, or approximately USD $2, on a good day. After hearing Dembe’s story, Wangarioffered to house her in her own home.

In March 2017, Dembe began to get sick and did not understand what was happening. Wangari took her to hospital, and Dembe found out she was pregnant. Soon after, Dembe decided to move out of Wangari’s house to take care of herself. She got a job as a casual laborer and managed to meet her needs with her small earnings. However, as her pregnancy progressed, Dembe realized how little she knew about pregnancy and began having a tough time working. She gave birth to her daughter, Tricia, in early September 2017.

Dembe then went back to doing casual work, but she was not earning enough money. The baby was malnourished, and Dembe could barely afford rent. Eventually, the landlord kicked her out when she could no longer pay rent. With no home, Dembe would work during the day, with her daughter on her back, and at night they would sleep in “kiosks”, stand-alone grocery booths.

At one of the kiosks, a lady gave Dembe a job as a housemaid and let her and Tricia live in the maid’s quarters. This arrangement did not last long. As soon as someone wanted to move into the house, the lady asked Dembe to move out.

Dembe went to look for a new place to stay, but the best she could find was space at the top of an unfinished building. While living there, Dembe would earn money fetching water in jerry cans of 20 liters and transporting them to people’s houses. One day, a young woman asked her to fetch her water. Upon delivering, they started talking and discovered that they we were both refugees. The young woman offered Dembe a meal and a place to stay. Dembe accepted, and she and Tricia moved in. The young woman attended school at RefuSHE, and one day, Dembe went with her to see what kind of assistance she could get. Case managers assessed Dembe’s case, and she and Tricia were taken to the Safe House.

RefuSHE is providing Dembe and Tricia with a secure home, meals, access to medical care, and psychosocial healing. Soon after arriving to the Safe House, Tricia was found to have TB and is receiving treatment. Dembe has not yet started school with RefuSHE, but once Tricia gets better, she will be enrolled.

Dembe has lived in Kenya for almost two years now, and Tricia is currently one years old. With RefuSHE’s legal and advocacy support, Dembe is a certifiedasylum seeker and will no longer live in fear of being arrested. Speaking to a case manager, Dembe revealed that before joining RefuSHE, she had lost hope in life and did not understand why she had to suffer. She is pleased that while at the Safe House, she has access to medical services especially since she has always been very worried for her daughter’s health. Dembe finally has peace of mind knowing where she is going to sleep.

Dembe hopes to study to one day be a doctor. After all she has gone through, she would be very happy to help others the way she has received help. She also would like to write an autobiography to inspire others with her story.

As a parting thought, Dembe mentioned that life has taught her very many things at such a tender age. The one thing that will always ring in her mind is,

"In life, don’t get tired of doing the best for yourself, even when no one offers any support”

*Name has been changed for protection and security reasons