Empower Abused and Trafficked Vietnamese Women

Tra, 24 years old, survivor of domestic violence 

Tra thought her married life would not be easy right after she got married. Her husband was sent to jail for 6 months being accused of damaging others’ property. Her mother-in-law did not consider her as a daughter-in-law but just another source of income for the family. She expected her to make money while insulting and beating her. While Tra was pregnant, her mother-in-law made her going to spray insecticide on the farm and sometimes beat her on her belly, saying that the baby was not her grandchild. Tra’s husband finally got out of jail but only ended up beating her up once in a while. Because of the dire relationship with her husband’s family, Tra went back to her parents’ home from time to time, even after she gave birth to her son.  

Tra was wrong in thinking that her parents’ home would be a safe shelter for her while being ostracized by her husband’s family. Her father left home since she was a child and she is the youngest of the 4 siblings. But seeing her and her son beat up and treated badly by her in-laws, her brother and sister-in- law not only didn’t sympathize with her, but tried to turn her away. They were afraid that if Tra kept staying home, they would have to share the family’s land property to her as well. One day they even locked Tra and her son, then less than 1 year old, outside of the house at night until Tra’s mother got back and let them in. They were beating and insulting her and were determined to kick her out of the house.  

Having nobody to ask for support, Tra sought help from local NGOs. Through some referrals she finally got to Hagar. At Hagar, she was supported with safe accommodation, nutrition and health care for both her and her son. She felt thankful for finally finding a really safe and thriving place for her son to be in. “If I had not found this house, I would not have had anywhere else to go to. I couldn’t neither go back to my husband’s family, nor my own family.”  

Growing up in a family without a father, which, among other reasons, might have caused her brother to be violent, Tra doesn’t want her son to grow up the same way with a violent father. Though being mother at a relatively young age, just like every mother in the world, she wants the best for her son. “I cannot be more thankful to have Hagar with me to heal my scars and rebuild my life. Hagar appeared when I was most desperate taking my child to run away from my violent husband and brother.” With Hagar support, her son is now going to kindergarten, which spares her some free time to spend  

on herself: getting psychological counseling, learning about infant care, taking up therapeutic arts activities at Hagar Recovery Center.  

Once feeling desperate having her own family and husband turning their back on her, Tra has now discovered the beauty of life because there are still people like Hagar staff who used to be complete strangers to her, sympathize with her and are committed to support her and her son in any way they can for as long as it takes.