Physical Health United States Project #5315

Chemo Pal Mentor Program Delivers Friendship

by Children's Cancer Association

Chemo Pal Mentor Program Delivers Friendship

Project Report | May 23, 2018
One Friendship with Catlin and Jack

By Kelly Carmody | Digital Content and Social Media Specialist

Catlin and Jack's Chemo Pal Match

Catlin is easy-going, an all-around sports fan and always ready to make a joke. He’s also a police officer, serving the area of West Linn. His job requires him to face intense situations and he often sees people during their lowest moments. Despite so much experience, nothing prepared Catlin for both the joys and sorrows of being a Chemo Pal Mentor.

September 2017, Catlin got the call from CCA, the Chemo Pal Specialists had found him a match and his name is Jack. Catlin was both excited and nervous to meet him. It was to become a friendship formed at just the right time. This is his story.

Meeting Jack

“About 8 months ago I was matched in the Chemo Pal program with my man Jack. Jack had just been diagnosed with Osteosarcoma in his shoulder and on his hip.

I remember being really nervous heading up to Doernbecher Children’s Hospital to meet Jack and his mom Tammi for the first time. I didn’t know if we would get along or if Jack would think I was funny (which trust me I am, but you never know he could have had a bad sense of humor). I got up to the hospital dressed in my purple Chemo Pal shirt. I walked into the room, and the first thing Jack did was make fun of me for wearing a purple shirt. Right then and there, I knew we were going to get along.

Jack had his original surgery. Surgery was successful: tumor removed, clear margins, and no evidence of cancer. He still had 20 weeks of chemo and a lot of rehab ahead of him, but he was ready to take that challenge head on. This kid had more courage than I could ever imagine having.”

Family Found

“For the next few months I went up to the hospital as much as I could while Jack was in town for his chemo. We had some epic Uno card battles, the smack talk was nonstop, and cards were thrown across the room in anger after a loss (not going to say which one of us threw the cards). There were times Jack was asleep when I got there and I sat and talked with Tammi. Slowly they became family to me.

A few months ago, I received a text from Jack and a phone call from Tammi. Jack’s new scans showed the cancer had spread and new tumors had appeared, one right near his spine, making surgery no longer an option. The plan had changed, no more chemo, and radiation was going to be done for pain management only.”

A Year to Live

“The next time I talked to Jack he told me he had maybe a year to live. I was at a loss for words. What is there to say that can make him feel better? So, I just told him all I could think of, that I am there for him no matter what, anything he needs.

This is news in life that to some people can make them adopt a woe is me attitude. I didn’t know how he would act the next time I saw him. Yet the way Jack responded showed me this is no woe is me kid. The next time I saw him was at a baseball game at Linfield where he threw out the first pitch. I brought my girlfriend at the time to the game. Not only did he throw a perfect strike, but he came off the field, grabbed my phone, found my girlfriend’s number, added her has a contact, and told me he was going to take my girlfriend on a date. Then proceeded to refer to himself as “Mr. Steal Yo Girl” for the next week or so. This kid had no quit in him.”

A Changed Life

“Life can change in the blink of an eye. Jack has taught me it’s how you handle yourself that’s most important. Of course, he has had his freak out moments, who wouldn’t? He is a 14-year-old kid who has to deal with something unfathomable. However, he is handling it like a champion. Not many people come into your life and change it. Jack has been one of those people for me, he has made me more appreciative, made me laugh, made me realize what is important, and overall made me a better man for knowing him. However much time he has left, he will continue to make people better for getting the chance to meet him. He is an inspiration.

Lastly, I want to give a big time shout out to Jack’s mom, Tammi. She was dealt the worst thing a parent can possibly be dealt. Tammi has handled it with class, dignity, and been there for anything that Jack needs. Making sure his medical care is top notch every step of the way. Tammi has been doing this while raising Jack and his two siblings all on her own. This woman deserves an award.”

Make the Most of Every Minute

“Life isn’t always fair, but the important thing is that you make the most out of every minute of it. It can get complicated but tell the people you love that you love them every single day.

The Chemo Pal Mentor Program gave me an opportunity to meet this amazing kid and his family. Any money donated goes towards future matches and the ability to run the program. Please help any way you can fund this program that gives people the opportunity to form bonds that will last forever.”

Jack and Catlin Enjoying a Game

Links:

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Mar 6, 2018
Bill, Five-Time Chemo Pal Mentor

By Kelly Carmody | Digital Content and Social Media Specialist

Bill and Aaron

When Bill walks into the Children’s Cancer Association (CCA), he greets just about everyone in the office on a first name basis. He’s easy-going, understanding, and a great conversationalist. He loves his job as a Portland realtor and finds joy in golfing, music, gardening, and his family. He’s also a CCA Chemo Pal extraordinaire, having been matched with five Chemo Pals over the past eleven years.

“I heard about CCA when I was transitioning from school teacher to realtor. I was new to the community and had some flexible time, so I wanted to give back.

I kept driving by CCA's office building and seeing the purple heart. One day, I was driving along the freeway, and there was a billboard with the purple heart again, so I decided to look it up online! I came across the Chemo Pal Mentor program (link), and it piqued my interest," Bill remembered.

Bill sat on the idea for a few days, but it wasn’t long before he decided to pick up the phone and call. Eleven years later, he’s still glad he did.

Becoming a Mentor

“I made the decision to be a Chemo Pal because having two healthy daughters, I couldn’t imagine being the parent of a child that had to be in the hospital for an extended stay. Serving those in need, who were dealt a bad hand is the least I can do. And there was a voice that kept saying I needed to do it.”

Bill was matched in January 2007 with Aaron who was 13 at the time. Since then he’s been matched to Jordan, Jackie, Luis, and most recently, Ash. Each match has been a special experience for Bill, but it was his first match, Aaron, who kept him coming back.

Meeting Aaron

“It was the day after New Year’s, I was watching a football game, and the phone rang. It was CCA and they said they had a match! I was excited and nervous because it was actually going to happen!

Aaron was in-patient at the hospital. When I entered his room, he sat in bed without much energy. I introduced myself and got a smile out of him, showed him the Chemo Pal bag, then offered to come back in a few days.

When I came back, he immediately asked about the Chemo Pal bag. Two hours later we were putting away all the Legos we’d played with. I offered to come see him again soon, Aaron ran over, hugged me, and he said, ‘Thank You.’ I was hooked, and at that moment realized how much these kids really appreciate it,” Bill said.

The Importance of a Chemo Pal

Not only did Aaron and Bill become fast friends, but Aaron changed Bill’s awareness around taking care of a seriously ill child.

“I came into this with a perception that most families had the resources and focus to fully support their child. When I was matched with Aaron, I realized how important a Chemo Pal could be in helping a family during this stressful period.

Aaron’s family came from a modest home, and he was an anchor for the whole family, he was really steady. We were matched for two and a half years, and I took on a mentorship role. We also got to do a lot of things outside the hospital setting. We went to Blazer games, family fun nights, bowling, and played frisbee.

That was 11 years ago now and we’re still good friends. It’s simply amazing to see the man he’s grown up to be.”

Meeting Ash

Bill’s most recent match with Ash has also been eye-opening.

“Ash and I were matched three years ago. He hadAcute Lymphocytic Leukemia and is on the autism spectrum. All my previous matches had been older boys ages 7-13 and they were all interested in interactive play, but Ash enjoyed parallel play and simply being in my presence.

My favorite memory with Ash is one of our later Chemo Pal meetups and the very first time we actually played together. Randall Children’s Hospital has a little kitchen area, and he loves to cook, so we would go in there and pretend to cook.

I brought a little motorized-motorcycle, I sent it across the floor to him and he would turn it around a send it back to me. It was a big moment, because Ash connected with me in a way he never had before.”

Thinking about Becoming a Chemo Pal?

With all that experience, Bill has some wisdom to impart on current or prospective Chemo Pals.

“When you think of becoming a Chemo Pal Mentor keep in mind that you’re there for the child. Try to leave your ego at the door, because there’s going to be times where they don’t feel like playing or they’re having a rough day and it might not be what you hoped for.

Being flexible is key. Try to be flexible with scheduling and checking with the parents about appointments. They have a busy life and sometimes the appointment may change and they might forget to tell you. Don’t take it personally. Stay in tune with what the child needs, let them dictate how you can help and you’re on your way to a successful match.”

Together we can provide joy to kids like Aaron and Ash during some of their most difficult years. Consider making a donation of $50 to fill a Chemo Pal bag full of toys or help us fund a match with a child, which costs $1,700 per year.

Bill and Ash

Bill and Aaron at the Hospital

Bill and Ash's First Meeting

Links:

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Dec 18, 2017
Two Chemo Pals, One Important Message

By Kelly Carmody | Digital Content and Social Media Specialist

Experience is something we hold in high regards at CCA, that’s why right after Dustin—CCA volunteer turned employee—graduated his first Chemo Pal match, we asked if he wanted to be matched again! For Dustin, the answer was easy, “Yes!”

When we asked Dustin how his Chemo Pals inspire him, he was quick to answer.

“Draven was diagnosed with Leukemia and we were matched for 3 ½ years. I love his energy and positivity; he lives his life normally with as much intention and goofiness as possible. He didn’t let anything slow him down.”

“Liam is inspiring for the same reasons. He had a very difficult surgery, but he took everything in stride. He was diagnosed in January with Osteosarcoma and when he learned he had to have surgery, he approached it with an incredible amount of maturity. He just finished chemo!”

Perhaps the most important part of each match was the benefit that Dustin’s Chemo Pals received from having a trusted adult mentor to confide in.

Draven’s Boundless Energy and Lessons From His Chemo Pal

“Having a Chemo Pal helped Draven improve his attitude about having to visit the hospital. Knowing that he would get to play with new toys helped his mom get him out of the house faster and improved his attitude during his appointments. In fact, the only time Draven would get upset was when his appointment was over and he had to leave! He would fake being sick so that we could keep playing!

Draven is naturally outgoing and energetic but having a Chemo Pal helped him learn to control his energy in a setting where the kids around him didn’t have the same enthusiasm. By the end of his chemo treatments Draven was able to empathize better with those kids. We practiced on learning how to “read the room” and how to stay calm if another kid did not want to play with him.”

Liam Confides in His Chemo Pal

“Having a Chemo Pal gave Liam social opportunities and someone to joke around with when his parents were at work and his brother in school. Liam would spend between 3-6 days at a time in the hospital and having someone come visit him with new board games was a huge mental “pick-me-up” for him. We talked about music and I attempted to give him advice about girls which he probably didn’t take very seriously! Having someone you can talk to about these silly things other than your parents or siblings is crucial to the self-esteem of teenagers.”

Draven and Liam had two very different experiences with Dustin as their Chemo Pal, but both of them gained a vital mentor and a lifelong friend.

Links:

Learn More About The Chemo Pal Mentor Program

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