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Mar 25, 2019

SOS update

A few more case stories over the last 3 months, which illustrate the type of calls we receive and the help we give

Case Stories

L          Domestic Violence

B called from Beawar in Rajathan and said that her sister L was very upset. L lives in Jaipur and her husband has recently died. However, since that date she has received a lot of abuse and torture from her in-laws over the property and whose name it should be in. Her father-in-law earns 50,000rs pension but doesn’t help L out with any money. She looks after herself, does her own work and looks after the children.  Because L lives in Jaipur, then the Sambhali counsellor needed to provide her with the number of the women’s HelpLine in Jaipur and explain the story to them and that if they do not take this on board, to file a complaint with the police regarding her situation with her in-laws.

 

U        Medical

U has been working at the Graduates’ Sewing Centre for the last year and for the last 2-3 months, has been suffering from arthritis in her hands. The fingers in her hands had swelled up and it was causing her a lot of trouble with her sewing work. She had been to the doctor, but the medicines he had prescribed didn’t help her. Due to the high cost of medicines and the medical investigation required she could not afford it, so requested Sambhali’s help.  U has 3 daughters and her husband doesn’t do any work. Assessing her financial situation, Sambhali offered her financial assistance and gave her the details of a good doctor she could use. After taking the medicines, she is now healthy and she can continue to do her sewing work well.

P     Medical

P was a taxi driver but lost his job a few months ago. His parents have both died and only has one sister, who is married. She has had obstetrics problems and after a lot of treatment she managed to conceive. Her husband is working but their financial situation is not very good. So P supported his sister to that she could receive treatment, but in the meantime he lost his job.  At the time of delivery it was necessary for his sister to have a Caesarean section to deliver the baby. This was something that his sister and her husband could ill-afford, so P and his sister came to Sambhali to ask for assistance and pay for the surgery. Sambhali paid her 25000 rupees for the surgery.

 

S    Forced Marriage

K rang to say that a girl called S was being forced to marry someone she didn’t want to and so K gave S the number so she rang the HelpLine and spoke with our Sambhali counsellor.  She said she has an arranged marriage but wants to study further, besides she and K are in love and wish to marry but their parents don’t approve because they are from different castes. S’s father has stopped her from going to college and imprisoned her in the house and wishes her to marry someone who is 10 years older than her. S therefore is very upset and cannot just leave her house with K because of their poor circumstances.   S asked for advice so that she could get married to K.  Our counsellor advised that this could only be done through Legal Aid and with the help of the law. At every district level there are district legal services authority centre where there is free legal advice given. K can go there and tell the magistrate the whole story and provide the information required to obtain a court marriage.

 

R     Domestic Abuse

R came with her sister to the Sambhali office. She said that she was very upset with her married life. She said she was married 20 years ago at the age of 10 and she said she has never been happy in her marriage and now she is a victim of mental and sexual harassment. She has gynaeacological problems and so she can’t have children. Then she adopted the daughter of her sister-in-law with the consent of the family. Her husband built them a house, in which R lives and is legally in her name. R went on to say that her husband has had many affairs with other women and many times he brings them to the house. She feels very bad about this but when she discusses this with her husband he abuses and beats her and threatens to kick her out of the house.  Harassed by all this , R filed a police case.

The case is still going on in court, but her father-in-law threatens to come and remove her from the house. R said she has no parents, so there is no-one to support her.  R gave Sambhali her husband’s number to let him know that he shouldn’t and couldn’t threaten R because the house is in her name. R felt better after the conversation and was advised further that she has nothing to fear because Sambhali would always support her in full.

 

S  Domestic Abuse

S called from Bhiwari in Rajasthan, upset about her marriage. She had a love marriage and 2 children. However, her husband has a relationship with many young girls. Many times she has caught her husband and when challenged he fights with her, beats her and drags her out of the house. Her husband runs his own business and does some driving work.  However, S doesn’t want to get divorced, nor does she want to leave her husband.

Sambhali advised her if she does not want to get divorced she will have to stay strong and need to think less about her husband and more about her children. She has to make the future of her children. She needs to work to financially support herself and so she needs to get a job. She has done a BBA, (Bachelor in Business Administration)  so that means she can get a job easily. If her husband tries to stop her she needs to get out and go out and keep continuing to go to work. This way the counsellor repeatedly said that S needs to go to work. After counselling, S felt very relaxed to seeing a vision of her future which showed her a way forward.


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Jan 7, 2019

Sewing Machine update

Sambhali Trust runs 7 empowerment centres with about 30 disadvantaged women and teenage girls in each centre. Within the centre they learn to sew garments and practise embroidery as part of the vocational training that Sambhali Trust offers each participant for 12 months. This enables them to have a good all-round education and to be able to earn an income once they have completed their course. We aim to provide all these women and girls their very own sewing machine on graduation day which takes place in February each year.

This enables all these women the opportunity to earn a living from home, thereby giving themselves some financial independence and to be able to help support their family. For the teenage girls, it offers them another skill to produce their own clothes and go further and make a business if they are not returning to full-time education.

All these sewing machines are the result of your's and others’ generosity, without which we could not provide these machines. These sewing machines provide the start to hope and prosperity for these women, who would not be able to afford to buy these sewing machines alone.

One of the teenage girls in our Jodhpur Empowerment Centre, Aarti, was speaking to one of our tutors and how a sewing machine will help her in the future.

Aarti has been connected with Sambhali Trust for last one year. Here she learns stitching along with studies in Hindi, English, Maths and general knowledge workshops in one of Sambhali’s empowerment centers for disadvantaged women and girls. Before coming to center she didn’t know how to sew but since coming to the centre over the last few months, she has learnt how to measure, draft, make patterns and sew a variety of Rajasthani garments.  She now she sews clothes for herself and her family. Her family supports her to come to center and they are very happy too.

Aarti’s mother died in her childhood, therefore, after growing up she manages the entire housework of the house and after that comes to the center too. She had studied previously at school until 8th class (secondary school goes onto 12th Class).  With the support of the center she has filled in the form to take the 10th class exams and so that she can further pursue her studies. She is also earning money by sewing clothes for other people in her community. There are various activities organised in the center like taking particpants to movies and short trips for recreation of the Sambhali students. Aarti had never gone for a movie before, therefore for her it was a great experience. For all these things Aarti and all the ladies want to thank Sambhali family.

Aarti will be one of the young women who will receive one of the donated sewing machines in February. We thank you all for your support and we hope to try and raise as much as possible to enable all our graduating students to receive a sewing machine, which will improve their lives.

Links:

Dec 28, 2018

SOS Project update

Case Stories

SK Domestic Abuse

S came to the Sambhali office with her uncle, who is a friend of her father. He spoke to our counsellor and said that S was very upset in her marital life. Her in-laws harass her. He went on to say that she had been married for 10 years and has a 5 year old son. After 2 years of marriage everything was fine but then the in-laws and husband changed their behaviour and started to mentally torture her. They drank alcohol and verbally abused her together with her husband also drinking alcohol and beating her. For a long time, S continued to live this life, but when her child became old enough to go to school, she found that her husband didn’t do anything to arrange for her child’s education. Battles and fighting ensued between her and her husband and in the end, distressed by all the bad behaviour, she took her son to her father’s house. She wants her son to go to school and she wants to become self-sufficient herself, (she studied at school up to 8th Class).

Sambhali discussed with her the possibility of her attending the Graduates Sewing Centre in Sambhali to learn to sew garments and items on a fast-track basis in 2-months, after which time she could start to earn a living by producing stock for the Sambhali boutique. She is now attending the centre and feeling much better with her new life.

 A and F.  Domestic Abuse and Harassment

 A and F are 2 sisters and came to the Sambhali office with their mother and aunt. They have been married for 4 years to 2 brothers, but they find they are unable to stay in their in-laws house for more than a month at a time.  Both husbands drink alcohol and beat them and kick them out of the house. The husbands have had extra marital affairs with other women and F’s husband ran away with a minor girl, for which he is now in jail. Whenever they go to the in-laws house, where their husbands live, they suffer severe mental harassment and A’s husband asks them to do illegal work.

Both sisters are very upset by this behaviour and want a divorce from their husbands, to which their mother also agrees this is the best option. However, their economic situation is not good and hasn’t been able to allow them to go through the legal proceedings. So they came to Sambhali asking for advice.  Our Sambhali counsellor advised them that there is a Legal Services Help Centre in the High Court, where free legal advice and assistance are provided. Our counsellor also spoke to one of the staff at the Legal Services Help Centre and explained the situation. The next day F and A and their parents  went to the Centre to discuss their case using the free legal aid offered to them.

 C  Forced Marriage

 C called from a village in the Ganganagar district to say she was very upset and unhappy. She explained that she was 17 years old and her family wants to marry her forcefully, but she wants to get a better future by getting a good education. The person whom she was intended to marry was 11 years older than her and she didn’t want to marry him. Her mother also didn’t wish for her to marry him, but because of her financial situation, C’s grandmother was pressurising her mother to go ahead with the marriage. Her father has psychiatric problems and is in a hospital. C explained even if she looked for help in the village, the police would not help her because of the influence of her grandmother.

Sambhali suggested that C go to the District Court in Ganganagar, where she will be able to find the District Legal Services Authority, where she can pursue their help to stop the marriage because she is not yet 18 years old, lower than the minimum age to get married.

 N.  Domestic Abuse

 J called from Mumbai about his sister, N. His sister lives in Rajasthan and has been married for 15 years and has 2 children. Her husband works at the mobile shop in the local town. For the last 2-3 years, N’s husband has been troubling her and torturing her in every way. His sister has been phoning her mother regularly asking for advice. Now N’s husband has started assaulting J’s sister and she is becoming more and more stressed and very depressed by all her husband’s behaviour.

J asked Sambhali for advice on how to prevent her husband inflicting this abuse onto his sister. Sambhali’s counsellor suggested to J. that N’s husband should be given the opportunity of counselling at least once to see if this could make a difference. He was given the number of the Police Women’s Help Line in Jaipur near their home town, so that he could talk to them and arrange for them to give counselling to his sister’s husband and at the same time put pressure on him to stop being violent. If her husband does not improve with his counselling, then a complaint could be filed with the police there.

 S Domestic Violence

S called and said that she was very upset with a family problem. She came into the office the next day with her mother to speak to our counsellor andt explained that she had been married for 4 years and had a 3 year old daughter. Her marriage was a love marriage and also an inter-caste marriage. Her father had died before their marriage and in his place she got a government job on the Railways. For this reason her mother and elder unmarried sister live in the Railways quarters with her. Her husband wanted her mother and sister to live elsewhere, but this is not possible, because she got her job and living quarters instead of her father, so she cannot leave her mother and sister alone.

Many times the fight got so much, that her husband attacked her. Two days beforehand, her husband had got beaten up and ran away from home. S asked our Sambhali counsellor for advice as to how to have a settled family life.  The Counsellor asked for her husband’s telephone number and she invited them both together for a discussion. S’s husband complained that S only looked after her own family and didn’t want to go his parents’ house at all. After much discussion, it was decided that both of them would need to learn to respect the parents of the other and that at least once a month, S should go to her husband’s village with her husband to visit his parents. The counsellor also stated that S’s husband should respect S’s parents and allow them to remain with them. She also explained that their 3 year old child needed both a mother and father, so that they should work on their relationship for the sake of their child.


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