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Dec 19, 2019

SOS Project Update

Some more stories from our SOS counsellor:

 

SS Domestic Abuse

SS called and wanted to talk about her sister S. She has been married for 2 years and lives with her husband separately from her in-laws. A few months after her marriage her husband started harassing her. SS said he brought his sister to his house after one month and S went back to her husband and he apologised. After that her husband continued to harass her in the same way. Now SS says that S’s husband has said if SS comes to pick up her sister again, she must sign divorce papers.

S asked Sambhali advice what to do. The Sambhali counsellor advised S that he shoud write a complaint to the police so that if there was any kind of aggression when SS went to pick up his sister, that S would be safe in case of a fight. If S’s husband beat someone up then the police could take action against him.  

 

D Domestic Abuse/Harassment

MD came to Sambhali with her son. She was very worried about her daughter P, who was an ex-student of Sambhali. M said that her daughter had been married for 17 years and has 2 sons. Her husband has an illicit relationship with another woman after 4 years of marriage. He disappeared from home for 2 years and then returned with the woman and their child. At that point, he ended the relationship with P and started living separately with his new family. Now he is harassing P for the last year to get out of the house.  P’s mother was very upset about his and came to Sambhali for advice.

Sambhali’s counsellor felt that P needed legal advice and referred her to a local advocate in Jodhpur, who had done some voluntary work with Sambhali already, by giving a workshop to the women in empowerment centres. After hearing this case, the advocate, asked P to file the case in court and asked P to make a statement infront of the Magistrate. He said he would fight P’s case without asking for any fees.

OD and MD – Medical

OD lives in Setrawa, a rural village in the Thar desert area of Rajasthan, 100km west of Jodhpur and has been suffering from an illness for the last 3 months. She had taken medicine from the doctors in the village, but her health had not recovered. Gradually her weakness increased and she started to feel very dizzy.  She has 3 children and her husband also not well and so is unable to earn much money. Because of this, she could not come to Jodhpur and take medicine from a good doctor so she sought financial help from Sambhali to get some good medicine.

Sambhali invited her to come to Jodhpur to the Raj Dadiji Hospital where they carried out investigations. Her blood tests showed that she was anaemic and they gave her some medicine. Now she is feeling much better again.

Another lady in Setrawa called MD had very similar medical issues and was also invited to the hospital to have blood tests and provided with medicine for her anaemia.

 

K. Domestic Abuse

K came to the Sambhali office as she was feeling very distraught. She said she had been married for 10 years, but she is not happy. Her husband kept torturing her all the time because she has not had any children yet. She also got medical treatment but in vain. Someone advised her to do some religious rituals and remedies to be able to help her conceive. In order to do this she needed to take a loan with her husband’s permission and started doing these rituals.  She took a loan of 70,000rs but it soon increased to 1 Lakh rupees because of compound interest. When her husband got to know about this, there was a lot of fighting and he beat her. Her husband threatened her that if this money wasn’t paid by her parents, then he would divorce her. He fought her and removed her from his house and sent her to Jodhpur (to her parents) and said he would not take her back until her parents had paid the money. K doesn’t want to divorce her husband.

Sambhali’s counsellor relaxed her through counselling and provided moral support, saying that she is very well educated and she earns an income. K was referred to the advocate for legal advice and she felt much better talking to him.

JD Domestic Abuse

JD came to the Sambhali office after a recommendation from an acquaintance. She is about 70 years old and has 2 sons and 3 daughters. All 3 daughters are married; one son is married and one son is mentally weak. She lives in a house with both sons (and son’s family) , that was built by her husband. Her daughter-in-law fights with JD and causes JD’s son to have a rift with his mother and fight with her also.  One day he beat his mother and expelled her from the house and said that he would not let her stay there or call the house in her name.

Sambhali asked the advocate for legal advice, who asked JD to file an application and put it to the commissioner’s office so the police can take action against her eldest son.

 

 


Attachments:
Sep 19, 2019

SOS Project Update

 

A few more case stories over the last 3 months, which illustrate the type of calls we receive and the help we give.

 


JC Domestic Violence

After a distressed phonecall from JC, she came to the Sambhali office with her mother.
JC has a good education and a government job and has been married to RC for nineteen years.
After one year of marriage she gave birth to their son. At this time she started to receive many forms of abuse from her in-laws regarding the dowry, which her husband supported.
After a few years of marriage, her husband began an affair with another woman who works in his office. He often does not come home for four days at a time and switches his phone off.

He denies the affair when JC confronts him and this causes many fights.
This has led to JC becoming depressed and no longer fulfilling her own abilities.

Through counselling, JC was able to talk through the problems, and to be heard.
She was given advise to get out of the house and use the good education she has, to not spend time worrying about a husband who does not worry about her, she must remember she has loving and supportive parents and she must use her education to better herself and become financially independent and to focus her time and attention on the life and future of her son.
This may inspire her husband to better himself too.

With Sambhali’s support her self-esteem is much improved and she now feels empowered and motivated to go and live a better life for herself and the future of her son.

 

 

K Verbal Harassment

K called from Jaipur after receiving a series of harassing phone calls and vulgar WhatsApp messages from the same person, using many different numbers.
She was asking for advice if anything can be done, because she is very anxious and unable to sleep due to such mental stress.

Sambhali informed her that cyber crime is a real crime and is becoming An increasing issue these days. Support was given to encourage her to go to the police and report this. And we informed her there is actually a cyber crime office in Jaipur where she will be taken seriously and such offenders will be traced and punished.

Sambhali gave proper advice and moral support, helping this girl to be relieved of mental stress.

 

 

S Sexual Harassment

S came to Sambhali office with her sister-in-law asking for advice.
Her husband drinks too much alcohol and does not earn much money. S is earning money herself, by cleaning people’s homes for the monthly home expenses.

Her husband’s elder brother who lives nearby, comes into the house at night, sexually harming her. He threatens that if she does not make a physical relationship with him he will pour acid on her. When she had the courage to tell her husband of his brother’s threats her husband scolded her questioning why she would want to deframe his brother.

Feeling disturbed by the situation S asked for help. Sambhali was able to support her by telling her not to be frightened and supported her to go to the police. The police have investigated the case and her husband and his brother have been barred.

She states expressly that she does not want to live with her husband. She can live alone and support her children with her own money.

In this way Sambhali provided assistance to a woman suffering from sexual harassment, provided moral support and helped motivate her to live a new and happy independent life.

 

 

NS Medical

NS is a previous student of Sambhali, she finished her studies eight years ago and now has two children. She has recently been diagnosed with arthritis after investigations.
Her husband is also sick and is in financial difficulty. Her treatment is expected to last a long time and she does not have the money for this.

With these considerations Sambhali agreed to assist her financially for six months with 6000rs per month for her medical care, enabling an economically disadvantaged woman, one of our own Sambhali girls, to receive good health care and lead a healthy life.

 

 

M Domestic Violence

SK called regarding her cleaning lady M who had confided her husband was drinking too much alcohol and beating her. M lives with her in-laws and her husband who is not earning any money, only spending the money M earns for the family on alcohol. She tries to talk to him about the alcohol but he only beats her, even in public and her in-laws support him.

She does not want to go to the police as she fears living alone but is asking for help in counselling her husband.
Sambhali were able to connect M with a women’s police helpline in Jaipur who can give her advice and will also talk to her husband, and advise him if he does not comply with the help they offer him then an official complaint can be made against him.

In this way, this woman has the support to change her situation, without fear, to lead a safe life.

 

 

RY Verbal Harassment

RY called, upset because a boy she made friends with is blackmailing her to marry him.
She accepted a social media friendship request from the boy a year previously, and they had become friends, then exchanged phone numbers and started talking on the phone.
At his force, she agreed to meet him and they met a few times at a restaurant. As she got to know him, she realised he was not an educated boy, he was in fact a vagabond and she did not want to spend a life with this boy.

She was upset because she found herself in a situation completely out of hand and hadn’t confided her family.
Sambhali was able to give support and advice to go to the boys mother to explain his blackmailing and stop him, and to go to her own mother.

Thus freeing her from stress and anxiety.

Jun 21, 2019

SOS Project update

A few more case stories over the last 3 months, which illustrate the type of calls we receive and the help we give.

 

B.P and A.M    Domestic abuse

B.P brought her friend, A.M, to Sambhali Office who wanted to talk about his daughter, M. 7 months ago, she got married to a business man, J.C, who has a lot of money; it is the second marriage of this man (divorced once before). After marriage, he did not allow his wife (A.M’s daughter) to come back home before 3 months have passed so her father decided to go and visit her in her house. At the beginning, JC (husband) was only scolding his wife on small matters but he became more and more violent (physically and verbally) so M moved back to her parents’ house. Now, she is 3 months pregnant and A.M is scared to send back his daughter as, in an act of violence, the husband could badly hurt both his daughter and future grandchild. Thus, he reached to the husband and his family to get guarantees regarding his daughter’s security but wanted more advise on what to do. The counsellor advised A.M to take his daughter to a women’s police station and fill a complaint so the husband would be summoned by the police and could be stopped from hurting his wife.

 

J.    Domestic violence

J. called from Jaipur to report a woman living at the Jaipur Railway Station with no food for the last 3 to 4 days. She knew the woman was a victim of domestic violence and fled home. She asked the HelpLine how to assist her. As she called Jodhpur HelpLine, the counsellor gave her the number of Jaipur’s so she could contact them directly. Then they could help the woman get to a safe place like Nari Niketan.

 

J.    Verbal harassment

J. called on behalf of his sister the HelpLine as she is really upset with her ex-husband. After a 2 years marriage, his sister obtained a divorce from the Court and went back home to live with her parents and brother. But it did not stop her ex-husband from calling her to make threats of abuse and even murder her. Because she obtained a legal divorce, J. was advised by our counsellor to accompany his sister to the police station with divorce papers in order to file an official complaint so then the police could take actions against the abusive husband.

 

P.    Medical

P. works at Fatima Graduate Centre and was diagnosed with stage 1 cancer one year ago. She is now undertaking treatment (chemotherapy) to prevent the spread of the disease and eradicate it. But the problem was that treatment is really expensive and her father does not have a good financial situation and she has siblings to be taken care for. She called Sambhali to ask for help covering the cost (30 000 INR) of treatment and half was offered to her. She will now be able to go to Ahmedabad to follow her treatment thanks to economic and emotional support from Sambhali.

 

R.P    Sexual harassment

R.P called the HelpLine regarding his 9 years old daughter receiving very inappropriate calls, texts and videos from boys. He is a gardener in a school and live with his family in Delhi. It is not the first time he reached for help as he already called the Child HelpLine and addressed a complaint to the police but nothing was done. Indeed, he is now pressured by the police to withdraw his complaint as the boys come from a wealthy family, itself pressuring the police to drop the case. The boys managed to trick his daughter into giving them her mother’s phone number and started to send porn videos but as she is only 9 years old, she doesn’t understand what she is watching and keep on doing it. Then, they started calling her to make inappropriate proposal (sexual harassment). To react, R.P wanted to know if it would be a good idea to talk about it on social medias. The counsellor provided moral support to a miserable father and advised R.P to go to a women’s police station and fill another complaint to a woman officer so then measures could be taken.


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